For the First Time
by JunkoTheHatter
Summary: "You better not die" she told him. He smiled and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Wouldn't dream of it." Mordin/OC
1. Get Up

Chapter 1

_"I'll be the first to stand." - Barcelona_

**Collector Base, The Infiltration**

The _Normandy _was just a few steps behind her. She stood in front of the vent, staring blankly ahead of her. There was no way of knowing if anyone would make it out alive or not. Her, Samara, Thane, Mordin….her mother.

She shook her head at the thought. Her mother had already died once. She had cheated death in its own game. If she died, Madison was sure that she would somehow come back once again.

Mordin came to her side and took her hand. The second their eyes met, she made a plea to him.

"You better not die," she told him.

He smiled and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Would never dream of it."

"Mordin, we have to move out!" Jacob called.

Mordin nodded to him and folded his other hand over hers. "Will wait for you. Good Luck."

And she was left standing alone once again. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

She had been training for this day for two years, and there was no way she was going to fail her mother now.

**Earth, 2183**

Madison was just a normal seventeen year old girl. If normal standards meant that she was an exceptional tech and biotic. She had dark brown hair that was styled like a side-cut and curled around her left shoulder. her gaunt face was graced with a lovely smile and rosy cheeks. The only make-up she ever wore was eyeliner and mascara on her florescent green eyes. She was beautiful, and she didn't have to try hard to show that.

She was something special. She was Commander Jane Shepard's daughter, but barely anyone really knew. Her mother got pregnant with her around the age of twelve when she was raped by a man that she had known and trusted all her life. Shepard was unable to take care of baby Madison, though. So she left her at an orphanage the day she had her. It wasn't until ten years later that she got adopted by Sam and Julia Harrison….And that was also the day her mother had introduced herself to Madison.

Shepard made an effort to visit her daughter many times a year. But it never really mended her relationship with Madison.

Madison walked through the door of her home calling to her parents, "I'm home!"

She walked into the living room and was greeted by Sam, Julia, and a man in an Alliance uniform in her living room. She set her school bag down and looked between all of them.

"Are you Madison Shepard?" the uniformed man asked.

Madison nodded. She felt an uneasy feeling overtake her as the man approached her.

"I'm Admiral Hackett with the Alliance military," he informed her. "Please, have a seat."

Sam and Julia made a small opening in between them for her. She sat, folding her hands in her lap. She kept glancing around at everyone's faces, trying to discern their feelings. The Admiral cleared his throat and leaned foreword in the chair.

"Something very unfortunate happened a few hours ago," he told her. "The _SSV Normandy _had taken enemy fire and crashed onto an unexplored planet."

Madison swallowed and tears started to sting her eyes. "What happened?" she asked.

The Admiral sighed and looked her in the eyes. "I regret to inform you that your mother, Commander Jane Shepard, was not able to get off the starship."

Madison kept completely still, not even blinking. The tears openly flowed down her cheeks and she made no effort to hide them. She never really was close to her mother but it still felt like she was being ripped in two. It felt like some part of her life was just torn apart in pieces, left to be unfinished for the rest of her life. There was no way it could be true. Her mom was Commander Shepard, **the Commander Shepard**! She was untouchable, invincible. It was a lie. Everyone was lying to her.

"You're lying," she whispered.

"I'm very sorry for your loss," he told her.

Sam and Julia tried to comfort her, but she pushed them away. She stormed out of the living area and slammed her door shut behind her. There was no way, no way that her mom could be dead. She grabbed the one and only picture that had been on her nightstand for the past two months. It was a picture of her, her mother, and her mother's entire crew in front of the _Normandy. _Madison didn't think that she deserved to be in the photo. But her mother interjected.

"You're the reason I'm fighting," she had said.

Madison wasn't sure if she believed it. Her mother was mostly gone from her life. There were large gaps in her life when she needed her real mom and she was never there for them. Her first steps, her first words, her birthdays….all of them had everything except a true mother to share it with. And now Shepard would never again get those chances back.

All of those moments were now disintegrating before Madison's eyes.

**Voyager Cluster, Yangtze System, Binthu, Two Years Later**

"Get these people into the facility now!"

The batarian slavers were very cautious. They had already had one of their units taken out, and they were not going to let the same thing happen to them. They split their team into three groups and sent them to the other Cerberus facilities.

They pushed the humans into the abandoned base and locked the door behind them. Little did they know that a masked figure stood unseen, waiting for the opportunity to take them down.

It was a woman. Her large bust in the tight, black N7 jumpsuit proved as much. She was really short, probably five feet tall.

She stood alone in front of the locked door, ready to take on whatever waited for her beyond the door. She took out her omni-tool and began bypassing the door. She worked at lightning speed, breaking through each firewall with ease and disengaging each lock.

There were two batarians on the other side of the door, but she was ready for them.

The second the doors opened, the slavers aimed their guns and shot. She was not there, though. They looked at each other confused and kept their guns aimed at the door. The girl had snuck behind them and she snapped ones neck. The sudden movement had made her visible. The batarian turned towards her, but before he could do anything, she withdrew her heavy pistol and shot him in the middle of his forehead.

The gunshots had alerted everyone in the facility. The leader looked around before giving out commands.

"You three!" he yelled, pointing at a small group. "Go see what that was! The rest of you, stand guard. I'm going to secure the slaves."

The three slavers walked into the next room, turning around in circles with their guns at the ready. There wasn't a single sound. No breathing, no footsteps, no reloading. Just silence. Next thing they knew, they were being thrown back by a biotic field. The woman came out of cover with her submachine gun and started shooting at them.

She then ran foreword into the next room, activating her tech armor. All the guards started shooting at the speedy blur. Barely any of the bullets touched her and would instead hit the other guards. She took the opportunity to use her new ability. She started cryo blasting anyone and everyone she saw. They instantly freezed as she raced around them, jumping crates and whatever obstacles were in her way. By the time she was done, all the guards were either frozen or dead by stray bullets.

She made her way to the back of the facility. The door leading to the storage area was sealed shut, and the screen was broken to keep anyone from unlocking the door. Now that she had recalled, she never did see the leader of this team in the base.

"Son of a bitch locked himself in…" she assessed.

She scanned the area around her and smirked when she found a loophole.

Meanwhile, the slaves and batarian lay waiting inside. A few of the women and children were crying while the men in the group tried to comfort them. Everything had been silent for a while.

"Please! If anyone's out there, help us!" a woman screamed. "My son is sick and dying! Please!"

The batarian shoved her down and aimed his gun at her. "Shut up, bitch!"

Just then, something landed on him from the ceiling. The masked woman had dropped through the air ventilation and landed right on top of him, breaking his neck. She stood and dusted herself off before taking her sweaty mask off.

"Lieutenant Madison Shepard with the Alliance military," she introduced. "Are you guys all right? Does anyone need medical treatment?"

The mother held her son close to her. "My son is very sick, ma'am," she sobbed.

"Everything will be all right," Madison reassured.

She got out her omni-tool and dialed something in.

_+Shepard to Commander, do you copy?+_

_+Commander Alenko here, what's the situation?+_

_+Cerberus Research Facility One has been completely cleared out of slavers. Requesting a Mako for transport. There is a sick child in the building.+_

_+The Mako will touch down in ETA ten minutes. Give the child some medi-gel. It should cover him in the meantime.+_

_+Sir, yes, Sir. Lieutenant Shepard out.+_

Madison turned to the woman and kneeled down next to her, distributing the medi-gel evenly.

"He should be fine for the time being, ma'am," Madison calmed her.

"God bless you, Lieutenant!" she said hugging her boy to her chest.

**En Route to Omega, Three Hours Later**

Madison stood at the front of the ship, watching Omega through the window. The Alliance had gotten reports of Blue Suns Mercs attacking human colonies. They were going to send her as an Operative to see what was going on. She had to admit that it was kind of a crap assignment, but it was something.

They had set her up with an apartment, pulled some strings to get her into the Blue Suns without causing suspicion, and even gave her documents containing everything she needed to know about the Blue Suns.

Most of them were apparently trapped in the lower parts of Omega, fighting off a disease. A salarian by the name of Mordin Solus had made a clinic and was killing them off. She didn't think that he was too dangerous for her to look into. He was fighting her enemy, which, in turn, was helping her.

"Don't you think you should take some time off?"

Madison turned and saw her commanding officer, Kaiden Alenco.

"What do you mean, sir?" she asked.

"Well, when your mother died you just went straight to work. Never even gave yourself time to mourn," he said.

Madison tried to remain calm. "I did mourn her. I still mourn her, but mourning won't bring her back."

"I understand, but it might help just to maybe loosen up a bit," he told her. "Not saying that you don't do your job good, but you shoot first then ask questions later."

"That's what my mom did. It made her a hero."

It was true. Her mother showed no mercy for anyone, even her friends. She was always friendly around Madison, but Madison had heard the stories. Her mother had killed the asari on Feros and the other on Virmire. She had left the council to die back on the Citadel. She had convinced Saren to kill himself. Countless lives were taken by her mother. Some of those lives were innocent. Some were far from innocent. She wouldn't give a second thought about anything, regret nothing.

Madison would never replace her mother, but what was the harm in being just like her.

"Your mother was a great person, however, her actions weren't always the best."

"Well," she began. "Sometimes we're left with little to no choice,sir."

Kaiden sighed. "You can choose to believe whatever you want, Lieutenant," he said. "I'm just making suggestions for you."

The ship came to a stop in the station, and Madison picked up her bags.

"I appreciate it, sir, but I have a mission to attend to."

With that said and done, she walked off the starship. Ready for any challenge that would come her way.


	2. You Found Me

Chapter 2

_"Where were you when everything was falling apart?" - The Fray_

**Collector Base, The Infiltration**

He listened to the battles around him from his omni-tool as he continuously shot at the countless collectors.

He heard a cry as Miranda's biotic field pushed back a small group, sending the collectors flying, at least ten feet backwards. Grunt charged into a collector, pinning it to a wall before blowing its brains out with his shotgun. Legion came up from a convenient protrusion from the ground and used his assault rifle to mow down any collector that came in his sights.

_+We're getting surrounded, Shepard!+_

_+We'll be fine, Garrus!+_

_+My shields have been disabled!+_

_+Then get to some damn cover!+_

_+MOM, IT'S FUCKING HOT IN HERE!+_

_+CAN YOU JUST HOLD ON A SECOND?+_

Mordin reloaded his overheating pistol after shooting his last bullet right between the eyes of a collector. A Collector had gotten closer to him during the process, and Mordin reached around its head and snapped its necks. He finished reloading and shot a Collector off the walkway, grabbing the extra thermal clip it had dropped.

Bringing his weapon up, he backhanded a Collector with it. The Collector staggered, and Mordin aimed the pistol at its temple before firing.

Mordin ducked and dove down to where Jacob was covering.

"Impossible. Seems to be never-ending hordes." he commented to Jacob.

Jacob nodded before standing to kill more Collectors with his pistol. The Collectors screamed in pure agony before falling to the ground. However, more would flow in. There were way too many for them to handle. It felt weird not having Madison there to reassure him and help them battle it out. There was no way for him to protect her, and that scared him.

For the past few months, she had always been there. She had done something to him that nobody, even he, could explain. Her not being there made him feel vulnerable. It just wasn't right…

She had always been there for him, and he had always been there for her.

Nothing would change that.

**Omega, Water Reserves, Eight Months Previously**

She was going to die.

No, seriously. There was no doubt in her mind. She was most definitely going to die.

She wasn't wounded yet. But she was still going to die.

She was anxious and scared. She had been trying to escape the Blue Suns for what seemed like days, but had actually been only three hours. _Just three hours._

She reached over and warped a vorcha before shooting him between the eyes and repeated the same process with another Blue Suns merc before dropping back into cover to reactivate her tech armor. Justice and punishment weren't driving her. Nor was the will to survive. It was just pure terror.

She kept behind cover just a little while longer, trying to catch her breath. She slid out of cover and shot a human merc in the shoulder. The man shot at her, and the bullet grazed her cheek, leaving a small red slit. She ducked back into cover , covering her cheek as a small tear came from the outer corner of her eye.

She was dead the minute she accepted the mission. Why was she so stupid? Was it because she was already dead before that?

Her armor hummed back to life, and she came out of cover to get rid of the human she had shot at. She saw her mother's face flash in her mind as the man fell to the ground.

It wasn't fair.

Her mom had the luxury of dying while she was stuck to just be a wondering soul, never meant to find her true purpose.

She came out and shot a batarian between the eyes. Her sudden movement caught the attention of the other mercs, and they fired their guns in a gigantic wave of bullets. She quickly ran back into cover before she was caught by one.

She saw her mother again. Heard her voice.

She remembered the report on the news the day after her death. That's when she knew it was true.

She switched to her submachine gun. She took a deep breath before sliding across the floor on her knees. She let the bullets fly, not caring to aim. She had killed two, shot one in the stomach, and another merc was left untouched.

"Fuck!" she swore.

She crawled behind another tank of water before sliding her legs out from under her. she lifted her hand and rubbed the sweat off her brow before reloading her weapon. She dropped her arms and leaned her head against the tank to take a breather.

She wondered if she surrendered, they would let her go.

She peaked her head out and examined the corpses. She felt humiliated about what she had just thought. She was stupid to think that they would just let her go after she killed some of their men.

She wouldn't let herself be shamed. For the Alliance. For Kaiden.

_Mom…_

She closed her eyes and let the rage fill her entire being. She came out of cover and stood, taking aim with her heavy pistol. She may not ever be able to bring her mother back, but if this was meant to be her resting place, she sure as hell wasn't going down without a fi-

Her whole world seemed to go in slow motion around her. She snapped out of it, noticing the bullets flying towards her, and dove back into cover. She felt like she was going to puke.

_No. It can't be possible. This is some form of God playing a cruel joke on me!_

She came out of cover once again and scanned the area around her. There was no one that even looked like her. It was all a hallucination. It wasn't possible. Her mother was dead. She reached up and shot a merc in his forehead and watched as the blood squirted from the wound. She ducked back into cover.

She could feel the bile coming up her esophagus. She leaned foreword and let the contents empty from her stomach, feeling the tears spring from her eyes.

She wiped her mouth, reloaded, and came out, taking aim. She saw a pair of vibrant green eyes staring into her own. Her face had proven to Madison that she was as real as real could get. However, synthetic scars on her face made Madison think it was simply a robot made to look like her mother.

_There's no fucking way._

She had seen her mother enough to know that her cheeks weren't _that _gaunt. Her skin wasn't _that _pale. It was a robot. It couldn't be her mother.

She went back into cover, chuckling at the idea of it.

_They must think I'm stupid to believe she's my mom._

She peeked out and saw the synthetic crouching next to a dark-skinned man with a Cerberus uniform. Her eyebrows came together, and eyes squinted in curiosity. The synthetic kept making side glances towards her.

What does Cerberus have to do with this?

_What are they up to?_

Madison stepped out and shot a vorcha in the heart. The synthetic looked at the dying form but did nothing. Madison aimed and shot at her. The bullet flew passed her face, but she still remained stationary. Madison yelled in frustration and rage, throwing a biotic field towards her. The field pushed her back a couple feet, but she just stood back up and glared at Madison.

Her Cerberus partners weren't doing anything, either.

Just staring at her.

Waiting.

_What the hell does Cerberus want with me?_

Madison clenched her fingers around her pistol, killing another merc. It seemed as though the mercs were unaware of Cerberus' presence. She wanted the robot to do something. Fire at her. Yell at her. Something!

_What the hell is going on?_

Something was up. Was this a joke? They weren't harming her, so she had no reason to shoot at them. However, they also weren't helping her. She reloaded her weapon and took aim once again.

_There better be a good reason for this._

The trio turned and vanished to the side. She let out a groan as she shot at two more mercs.

She went back into cover. She could feel more puke in her stomach. All her emotions were at war with each other. She wanted to be mad at Cerberus for causing this sudden change. She wanted to be sad at the thought that her mother wasn't really alive. She wanted to be terrified because a group of mercenaries wanted her dead and were hell bent on making that happen. She couldn't handle it.

She started running to a new cover, not bothering to aim. Once she was safely behind a different water tank, she reloaded. She looked out and scanned the area.

_Where did those Cerberus motherfuckers go?_

She had wanted them to do something, but now that they were gone, she regretted not doing anything. She wanted to see them. She wanted to know that she wasn't insane. As time continued on, she really did begin to question her sanity. Were they really just a hallucination? Did she actually see them? Did they even exist?

She was dead.

She was most definitely in hell.

She came out of cover, completely exposing herself. The second that she did it, a wave of mercs ran foreword. She gasped and ducked back, her eyes widening in horror. They _really _wanted her dead. There were too many of them for her to handle by herself. This was it for her.

A flash of black armor ran past her, catching Madison's attention. It was the synthetic. She took cover behind a water tank next to Madison's tank. The synthetic looked at Madison and smiled. It was Madison's smile. She winked at Madison before getting out of cover. Madison could feel the barf again.

God was doing this to her. She knew it. He wanted her to live, but wanted her to suffer by sending a synthetic copy of her mother.

The synthetic reached behind her and pulled out her assault rifle. She spit to the side and shot at the mercs in front of her, moving slowly toward them. The mercs quickly dispersed to find cover. Everything about the robot Shepard was like the real Shepard. Her movements. Her fighting style. It hurt Madison to see it.

But it was a machine, it was meant to be a flawless impersonation. She wouldn't trust it.

Madison switched to her submachine gun and ran into new cover. She took aim. She saw a merc still running to find a hiding spot, and she took the opportunity to shoot him in the back of the head.

Madison watched the synthetic Shepard as she fired a concussive round at another fleeing merc.

"Don't worry about the double agent! Take down the Cerberus soldier first!"

_You're gonna wish you hadn't have said that._

The mercs shot blindly at the synthetic, and she just kept walking foreword, shooting anyone in her sights. The other two Cerberus officials used her distraction to their advantage, coming up from behind the mercs and taking them out. It was a very strategic plan. One that Madison might not have ever come up with.

Madison was so busy watching the battle in front of her that she didn't see the group of mercs coming behind her. They started to fire at her, and Madison quickly brought up a biotic barrier to protect her. But she was too weak from throwing up everywhere and just the basic shock of situation. She would only be able to keep up the barrier for a few seconds.

She didn't need to keep the barrier up, though. Synthetic Shepard had come to her aid with a shotgun. She fired at one of the mercs faces making him unrecognizable, his face just blood, muscle, and bone.

The shot alerted another merc. Shepard walked up to him and shot the gun out of his hand. He got on his knees and begged for mercy.

However, the synthetic wasn't one for mercy. She stepped foreword and snapped his neck. After more brutal, unmerciful takedowns, Shepard finished off the mercs by shoving him down and blowing out his ribcage.

Shepard turned and smiled at Madison. She felt like puking again.

"It's been a long time, Sweetheart."

It wasn't a robot's voice. It was _her _voice. That wasn't enough to make Madison trust her, though.

Madison thrust a biotic field towards her. It pushed her against a tank. Madison ran foreword, pinning Shepard by grabbing her neck. She aimed her pistol at the synthetic's forehead, ready to kill.

The Cerberus officials walked up behind her, their guns at the ready.

"Lower your weapons!" Shepard shouted. "Don't you dare shoot my daughter!"

Madison and Shepard just stared at each other. Madison daring her to try something. Shepard daring her to shoot.

Shepard stepped foreword and grabbed the gun out of Madison's hand. She then ducked down and picked her up from the legs, leaving her limp over Shepard's shoulder.

That's how they entered the _Normandy. _With Madison kicking and screaming at her mother.

**Normandy SR-2**

Everyone stood in the briefing room, completely silent. Jacob just stood with his arms crossed, Miranda had her hip popped as she was leaning on it with one of her hands resting on it, and Shepard and Madison were at opposite ends of the table, staring each other down.

"Madison, explain yourself," her mother commanded. "Why were you on Omega?"

"Me?" Madison yelled. "What were _you _doing there? You've been dead for two years!"

"Believe it or not I did go there to get you," she explained. "Omega is dangerous, Madison."

"I can take care of myself, Mom. I'm an adult now," she informed. "I have a different life now. I can't just leave it to join sides with you. Besides, you're working for Cerberus, and I'm pretty sure that you know that Alliance and Cerberus are enemies."

"_I'm _not working for Cerberus, Madison. I have complete control of this mission and what we do. And I brought you here because I felt like there was no other choice. You were going to kill me!"

"Can you really blame me? You randomly show up after two years, expecting everything to just be sugar and rainbows and butterflies between us! I was terrified, Mom. You have synthetic scars on your face. I thought you were a robot!"

"We're getting off topic," Miranda interjected.

"SHUT UP!" Madison and Shepard yelled.

Miranda sighed. "You two really _are _related…"

"Mom, I was on a mission," Madison said. "I was sent to spy on the Blue Suns. Everything was fine for a couple of months but, somehow, they found me out. They sent me to go patrol the water supplies of the city. I was ambushed. I was handling it just fine!"

"You were _puking_ all over the place," Miranda commented.

Madison stepped toward her. "Did anyone ask for your opinion? No? Then shut the fuck up."

Miranda rolled her eyes and left the briefing room, Jacob following behind her.

Madison and Shepard started their staring contest again.

"Look, Madison, Miranda and Jacob wanted me to go get Mordin first. But I wanted you to be the first to know that I was alive again," Shepard explained. "It would be great to have you on my team, but I know that you're an adult, and you need to make your own decisions now."

Madison folded her arms. "What do you want from me?"

"I just want my _daughter _to help me take down one of the biggest threats in the galaxy."

Madison thought for a moment. She had started her training and gotten recruited into the Alliance so that she could have the chance to get back at the Collectors. She wouldn't give that up because of the tensions between her and her mother.

"I'll join you."

**Omega, Mordin's Clinic, Two Hours Later**

Madison glanced at the sick people around her. Everyone was coughing and a couple were puking. She almost felt bad that she was completely immune.

Almost. She liked being healthy, after all.

Madison glanced at the three of them before shaking her head.

Miranda had been chosen to come with them. She didn't really like Miranda. Then again, Miranda had made a _horrible _first impression on Madison. Miranda had wonderful biotics, though. But biotics _and _Tech were covered by Madison. They would've been better off bringing Jacob.

It was then that she had laid eyes on Mordin Solus for the first time. He was tall, not tall in normal standards, but he was taller than her, at least. He had light brown skin with little marks of darker brown here and there. There was some kind of tribal marking on his head. A tattoo? Or a birthmark? She couldn't tell.

"Professor Mordin Solus?" Shepard greeted.

He looked up and approached them, omni-tool at the ready. He scanned them. There were two negative beeps followed by a positive beep. He looked up at Madison.

"Madison LeeAnne Shepard. Age nine teen. Resident of Omega?" he said in a speedy tempo.

Everyone stared at her in expectation. She cleared her throat. "You're right, sort of…"

"So, not resident of Omega then?" he asked. "Hmm. Saw you conversing with various Blue Suns Mercs. No. Not merc. N7 jumpsuit. Alliance military. Sent to spy."

"Bingo," she sighed.

He scanned the rest of them, unsure of what to expect. "Here for something else. Vorcha? Crew to clean them out? Unlikely. Vorcha a symptom, not a cause." Madison looked at her mother, seemingly getting annoyed. "The plague? Investigating possible use as bio-weapon? No. Too many guns, not enough data equipment. Soldiers. Not scientists. Hired guns, maybe? Yes! But who-"

Shepard forced a smile and interrupted. "Relax, Mordin. I'm Commander Shepard and I came here to find you. I'm on a critical mission and I need your help."

Mordin continued to type on a small laptop, not bothering to look up at them. Madison hated it when people ignored others like that. "Mission? What mission? No. Too busy. Clinic under-staffed. Plague spreading too fast. Who sent you?"

"It's like he's not even _really_ talking to us…" Madison hummed.

Mordin glanced at her, but she just shrugged. Shepard shot a glare at her that said _keep your mouth shut._

Mordin got distracted by something else under the operating table and Shepard walked foreword. "It's a covert and privately funded human group."

Madison rolled her eyes. It wasn't really "private" with her wearing Cerberus armor and a Cerberus Operative _right next to them._

Mordin shot up and Madison flinched in surprise. "Related to plague? Doesn't affect humans. Human-centric interest. Few human groups would know me," Mordin had left the conversation to study a piece of medical equipment. Madison was just about to explode on the salarian. "Equipment suggests military origin. Not Alliance Standard. Except for Miss Madison Shepard. Spectres not human. Terra Firma too unstable. Only one option. Cerberus sent you," he inhaled deeply. "Unexpected."

"They did the same shit to me, don't worry," Madison informed.

Shepard glared at her again before continuing the conversation. "You're very well informed. How did a salarian scientist hear about Cerberus?"

"Crossed paths on occasion. Thought they only worked with humans," he said. "Why request salarian aid?"

"I'm on a mission to shut down the Collectors, and I need your help."

Mordin put a fist to his mouth, clearly in deep thought. "Collectors. Interesting. Plague hitting these slums is engineered. Collectors one of few groups with technology to design it. Our goals may be similar," Shepard nodded. "But must stop plague first. Already have a cure. Need to distribute it at environmental control center. Vorcha guarding," another deep breath. "Need to kill them."

"Of course," Madison moaned. " Why can't anything be simple?"

"Madison, if you open your damn mouth again, I'll send you back to the ship."

"Sending me to time out? I'm _so _scared. You hurt my feelings."

"We'll get rid of the vorcha," Miranda boomed, glaring venomsly at both of them. "Wish _I _could go back to the ship…"

"Lucky for you, the door's right there," Madison remarked, showing a fake grin.

Mordin nodded to her, "Lovely grin."

The comment had caught everyone off guard, even more so Madison. "Umm, thank you?" She didn't know whether to be creeped out or flattered. It was kind of a mixture of both.

At that moment, red lights flashed and everyone looked around in a daze. Mordin brought up his omni-tool. Shepard stood protectively close to Madison, and Miranda brought up her gun. Madison's reaction was a bit more…colorful.

"What the fuck was that?"

"Madison!" her mother scolded.

"So _now _you have a problem with my language?"

"Okay, _really_?" Miranda chimed in. "Can we try to focus now?"

"Vorcha have shut down environmental systems. Trying to kill everyone. Need to get power back on before district suffocates," Mordin informed, pressing a few buttons into his omni-tool. "Here, take cure," he handed the cure to Shepard then approached Madison. "Also, bonus in good faith. Weapon from dead Blue Suns mercs. May come in handy against Vorcha," He handed three identical hand cannons to her. She studied them for a second before tossing one to Shepard and Miranda. "One more thing. Daniel. One of my assistants. Went into Vorcha territory. Looking for victims," he breathed in. "Hasn't come back."

"If I see him, I'll do what I can to help," Shepard assured him.

Madison raised an eyebrow at her mother. Two years ago she would've refused, saying that she had too much on her plate or that the mission was more important. She'd had a change of heart, it appeared.

**Omega, Environmental Control Center, Twenty Minutes Later**

"You know, mom, for creepy looking squishy aliens, Vorcha are _really _hard to kill…" Madison gasped. She got out a medi-gel and drove it into her jumpsuit's interface, feeling her strength regenerate.

"Vorcha are actually very hard-boned like the krogan. That's why they can take as much damage as the krogans," Shepard told her.

"I'll remember that forever, Mom. Thanks for the biology lesson."

"I was just saying, Madison."

"Sorry, but I became apart of the military so I wouldn't have to deal with that shit."

Madison tossed a medi-gel pack to Shepard, who accepted it. Madison watched as she inserted it into her armor. Lucky bitch didn't even get wounded. "So, are you like some sort of terminator or something now?"

Her face got cold and she glanced at Miranda who was scanning for more targets. "It's…difficult to explain, sweety…"

"Well, both our stories are really interesting…."

"Yours isn't about how you've been dead for two years and miraculously brought back to life."

Madison felt her chest tighten. "Did you really….die?" she asked. It wasn't until then that she realized, she didn't want to believe that she had died. She had hoped that she had just landed on an uncharted world, hunting for food, struggling to survive, then was found by Cerberus. She was just showing the galaxy that she was just fine, and her death was just a misunderstanding.

She would've believed that. Not the truth, though. The terrible truth that…she had actually been dead.

Shepard nodded. "For two years. Felt like I was blacked out for five minutes, though."

"Well, I guess you're Jesus now…" she sighed. "Because of Cerberus."

"Like I said, baby. It's complicated."

Reality came crashing down around them. Rockets came blasting onto their cover.

"Miranda, what the hell?" Madison shouted. "You were supposed to be look out!"

"That's what I was doing!" Miranda yelled. "They must have a back door of sorts!"

"Well, this is problematic…" Shepard sighed.

"Mom, go and activate the fans! I'll keep them distracted!"

"I can't just leave you here alone!"

"You don't have a choice! Miranda will go to one side and you'll go the other way! I'll be fine."

Shepard stared at her for a second, then nodded. "If you really think so. Miranda you take left!" Shepard walked to the right before turning back to Madison. "Call over the radio if you need help."

…

Madison ducked as another missile passed over her head, boring a hole into the ground where it landed. Her tech armor was really low.

_+Mom, I don't know if I can handle this much longer!+_

_+I'm trying to go as fast as I can, baby, I think I've almost got the fans running!+_

_+Well, please hurry!+_

She started to laugh. _Laugh. _She couldn't remember the last time she laughed in combat. Was it the time she had killed her first thresher maw? No. That was different. She was laughing then because she had almost died.

_+Shepard, I'm trying to get to the fan controls, but it's not working out. You may need to come to me instead.+_

Madison could see Miranda on her wing, desperately dodging cover. Her kinetic barriers seemed to have died and she tried to fight without getting hit by bullets. Miranda grabbed a potted plant with her biotics and flung it desperately at the oncoming mercs.

Madison came out of cover to shoot some more at the mercs with missile launchers. She dove over another protrusion, drawing the attention of the mercs.

_+Mom, I'm your _daughter_! My needs come before anyone else's!+_

_+The mission takes priority, Lieutenant Shepard.+_

Seconds seemed like hours as Madison kept dodging from cover to cover, throwing warps at the vorcha who regenerated any damage she did to them. Finally, Shepard came to her aid as a krogan flew by her and Madison. Shepard took out her shotgun and fired a concussive round at it, instantly killing it.

Shepard quickly looted some thermal clips before another missile sailed over her head. Shepard quickly brought up her sniper rifle and took aim at the missile-weilding mercs.

Madison tried to help by sending more warps.

The vorcha quickly took cover as their barriers sizzled and died. Madison and Shepard had managed to lower their defenses, spraying vorcha blood on the walls. The vorcha fired more missiles at Shepard. Being someone who had fought many missile-weilding enemies, she turned and ran for her life.

Madison screamed at her mother as she ran past a completely worn out Miranda with about three missiles on her tail. She aimed blindlessly with her assault rifle, yelling at Miranda to get to some cover, keeping the missiles on her trail.

"Mom, what the fuck are you doing!" Madison screamed. She was running behind the missiles trying to shoot them with her heavy pistol while at the same time trying to avoid the bullets from her mother's rifle.

Madison eventually gave up and took cover behind a pillar. She aimed at a vorcha trying to get him in the neck. Once the vorcha was down, Madison began to run toward the vorcha trying to avoid their missiles. She jumped and used her biotic abilities to push her higher, so she could reach the ledge the vorcha were stationed on.

Madison roared as she rolled painfully onto the ledge. She ran to where she had killed the vorcha and snagged his missile launcher. She aimed it directly at the remaining vorcha, fed up with just sneaking around and shooting.

_+Regenerate this, motherfuckers!+_

After she had dealt with them, she jumped down off of the ledge, holding the missile launcher up. "Hey, Mom! Can I keep it? I promise to feed it everyday!"

Shepard laughed and shook her head. Her face turned from amusement to terror as she continued to stare at Madison. She reached behind her back, pulling out her sniper rifle to take aim. Confused, Madison turned and was met by a batarian. She reached for her pistol but the merc grabbed her arm and pulled her foreword.

Madison could feel something being inserted into her stomach. Her vision became blurry and her mind became hazy as the batarian rested his chin on her shoulder.

_Where am I? What's going on?_

The merc fell to the ground with a bullet between his eyes. Madison felt her stomach and found a handle of sorts. As she pulled, she let out an agonizing scream of pain. She dropped the knife and pressed her hand to her stomach. She fell to her knees as blood began to dribble out of her mouth. She felt terribly sleepy. She couldn't fight it.

…

She was stupid to hope that she would survive. She was weak. Not even able to keep undercover for more than a few months.

_She _had risen from the dead. _She _got the chance to finish what she had started. However, her daughter's life would be taken in return.

_Mom…_

Pain in her stomach. That's all she felt was the squishy sticky feeling of the hole in her stomach. Sound was just echoes. She could feel the blood, taste it, oozing from her mouth. The metallic poison would drown her.

"MADISON!"

_Mom._

She tried to utter something. Hands touched her face.

_Mom?_

"…son. MADISON LEEANNE SHEPARD! Can you hear me?"

_Shut up, Mom. I can hear just fine. _She sucked in a breath, choking on her blood in the process. She wanted to say something. Tell her mom she was fine. Alive. Blood entered her breathing canal clogging her throat. Her lungs needed air. She looked around with hazy eyes at the two faces in her vision. One had long dark hair with a Cerberus uniform. One had vibrant green eyes with black armor.

_Mom. _She focused on the green-eyed woman, releasing her grip on the missile launcher. She reached up and held her mom's hand to her face.

"Madison! Madison. Fuck…Madison. _Miranda!_ Radio the _Normandy_ right now!"

_The _Normandy _blew up, dumb ass. _She tried to say. _You died on it, remember._

She coughed up more blood.

"Tell them to have the med-bay prepared!"

"Shepard, There's no way we'd get her there in time. We have to take her back to the clinic."

"Hold on, baby, just hold on!"

Medi-gel was pumped into her system until she felt about ready to burst. Someone lifted her up. She was flying. To heaven? Was she dying? Or was she still alive?

"We have to hurry. The mercs could ambush us again at any moment."

"Damn it. Connect more medi-gel to her suit. She can't die!"

"We might over dose her, Shepard!"

"Do it now, Miranda!"

"Shepard, we can't do that!"

_She certainly does have a change of heart. So merciful…_

"She's dying! You better clear that god damn table, Mordin!"

_+I'm sorry, baby…+_

She yelled in pain as she felt something stab into her arm through her jumpsuit. They jostled her around as they removed her suit, putting her through more pain.

_+Listen to me, sweetheart! Just hang on!+_

_Mom. I'm fine. I can handle myself._

She was barking commands at everyone. She could here her throwing things in frustration. She tried to reach out to her mother but her whole body felt asleep.

_+Mordin!+_

_Mordin?_

A familiar face came into her vision. Brown skin. Tattoo. Salarian.

"Must remain calm. Can't operate under stress."

_Operate? What's going on? Mom?_

"Mordin…Mordin, you better not kill her or I swear to God I'll kill you!"

"Will do what I can. Wounds don't appear fatal."

"Baby, don't die!" Shepard's voice was farther away. "You'll be fine, baby, ok?"

_I'm fine. I can take care of myself._

Darkness engulfed her. The pain had sub-sided.

**Normandy SR-2, Twenty-Two Hours Later**

She slowly opened her eyes, the whiteness of the room almost blinding her. Was she dead? In heaven perhaps. She sat up and she felt the pain sear on her stomach. Nope, not dead.

"Madison. You need to lie still. Your wounds haven't healed yet."

It was a familiar voice, but she couldn't put a face to it. She had met the person somewhere but couldn't remember where. She looked and try to focus. The person was next to her now, touching her shoulder. Silver hair. She had to think before she could put a name to the face.

"Ch-Chakwas?" she coughed, the dryness of her throat was agonizing. "What's…happened? What's going on?"

Everything was just a dream. Her mother hadn't ever died. She had never gotten stabbed. She was sitll her seventeen-year-old self. Nothing had changed.

"Where's Mom?"

"She went back to Omega. She's looking for Archangel, I think."

Well, so much for "dreaming" that nothing happened. "But…" How did this happen? Why was her mother working for Cerberus? Who was Archangel? The questions swam around in her head.

"I think you need to rest more, Madison. Just lie down, and, when your mother gets back, I'll tell her you're awake."

"I can manage to tell her myself, thank you…" She moved her legs off the bed and started to feel a desperate pain in her brain telling her to stop. She lifted one hand to rub her forehead and the other tried to touch her stomach…Chakwas held it back.

"Madison. You've sustained an injury that almost killed you and undergone extensive treatment. You can't be moving this much yet." She grabbed Madison's other arm to try to lay her down, but she just resisted and pushed her hands away. It was then that she realized that she was not wearing her jumpsuit. Just a white tank top and her underwear.

"How bad is my…?" She pushed herself off the bed and was met by blurry vision and nausea. She tried to steady herself on Chakwas, the ground seeming to jerk from underneath her.

"Well, I wasn't the one who treated you. Apparently, you were hopped up on medi-gel for a good chunk of the treatment…" Chakwas told her. "He sewed it up and managed to get the blood out of your lungs. The wound will heal, but there will be scarring."

"Who's…_he…_?" she looked up at Chakwas.

"Professor Mordin Solus…" she told her. "He's down in the tech lab on the second floor, if you want to see him."

"I need my clothes…" Madison trailed off. She looked around and saw some extra clothes on a bed. A black skirt, a red button-up shirt, and black flats. They had gone through her stuff it seemed.

Madison focused on Chakwas as she tried to help her put it on. There were so many questions in her mind that needed answers. However, the only one that could answer them was her mom. And she was out so only one other person would do. "Where's Mordin again?

Chakwas frowned as she straightened the collar of the button-up. She _wanted _Madison to rest, but, if she had her mother's genes, she would be stubborn until the end. "Out the doors, straight through, then turn back towards the elevator. Go up to the second level. Turn right at the stop, and you'll find the tech lab. He's there."

"Thanks," she stepped toward the door then stopped. "Is Mom _really _working for Cerberus now?"

"Not really," Chakwas said. "Cerberus is funding the project, but it seems that your mother has complete control."

That didn't make any sense to her. If Cerberus was funding the mission, then they sure as hell were controlling it to.

…

"So, you're Commander Shepard's daughter?"

Madison stopped in her tracks and examined the woman before her. She looked like her mom but was obviously not related and not her. Her lips were too full, her hair was to orange, she had freckles on her face. Nope. She was different from her mother.

On top of that, her mother was a stone cold killer. Showed no mercy. Shot first, asked questions later. This woman was clearly the more motherly type. Smiling. Probably hadn't ever fired a gun in her life.

"My name is Kelly Chambers. I'm a yeoman."

"My mom never seemed the type to _need _a yeoman…" was all she could utter.

_+You'd be surprised. This _Normandy _is better and well equipped.+_

She recognized the voice but still couldn't put a face to it. Yet, another person she hadn't seen in two years. "And you are…?"

_+Don't tell me you forgot me already. It's Joker! From the original _Normandy_.+_

"We've also installed an AI on board," Kelly said.

Madison's eyes widened. "Really…?"

_+Yep. Don't bother trying to find the off switch. I've already tried that.+_

"Greetings, Lieutenant Shepard."

She turned her head and stared at the holographic orb that had appeared next to the elevator. She raised an eyebrow. "Mom is ok with this? You know a whole race of AI tried to kill her."

"I was programed not to harm any member of this crew, especially Commander Shepard. I do not plan to turn rogue."

"…..Whatever you say…."

_+Yeah, I don't trust it, either.+_

Madison rubbed her hand against her face. "This can't be real…"

_+You haven't even seen _anything _yet. You should go look around.+_

"Mordin Solus is on board, you know," Kelly said. "I think you should go talk to him. He's-"

"In the tech lab to the right. I know," she turned sharply and approached the door. She tried to sort out her emotions that were still rummaging through her head. Anger. Sadness. Joy. Relief. Thankfulness. They were all battling each other, and she felt like puking again.

All thoughts faded away when she saw Mordin. Typing over his computer. Not bothering to look up and greet her.

"Uh, Mordin?" she greeted.

He continued to type. Ignoring her. Madison felt the rage build up inside her.

"You know, you could at least _look at me _when I'm trying to thank you."

Mordin stopped and turned toward her. "Sorry. Did not mean to offend. Working on data."

"Well, its not like my minute and a half conversation is going to harm your research," she said, venom coursing through every word.

He nodded. "My apologies. Unfortunate mistake. Won't happen again."

Madison leaned on the wall. "Well, I was just going to say…" Madison sighed, trying to release the stress. "Thank you for saving my life. I _greatly_ appreciate it."

"Had no choice. Mother would've killed me. Besides. Can't let patients die."

"I wouldn't have died. I could've taken care of it myself."

"Didn't appear so. Choking on blood. Fading in and out of consciousness. Wouldn't have lasted thirty more minutes."

Madison shook her head, trying to calm down. "Ok, well, thank you for _helping_. Now, if you'll excuse me I have other things to attend to."

She turned toward the door and was greeted by her mother who had ran up and hugged her tightly. Madison felt the pain in her stomach.

"Mom. Mom! MOM! YOU'RE HURTING ME!


	3. Forever Girl

Chapter 3

_"No matter what you do, I'll be there for you." - Forever the Sickest Kids_

**Collector Base, The Infiltration**

_+We need to get to the door! Now!+_

_+The door will be locked anyway, Shepard!+_

_+Are you suggesting that we just wait?+_

_+Of course not, but-+_

_+Then you do as I say!+_

_+You are so hard to deal with!+_

_+Madison! Are you at the door yet?+_

_+I'm here, mom!+_

She yelled. She got the first door open, and the fire team flowed in.

_+Hold on! These locks are a little advanced for me!+_

She chanced a glance through the door and pulled out her submachine gun. "You guys need to pay attention! There are dozens of these guys behind you!" The team spun around, reaching for their weapons to aid her.

_+Oh my god…There are swarms of them!+_

_+I kinda guessed that when we started, Samara! Madison! Will you get this damn- AHH! SHIT!+_

Madison panicked.

_+Mom, what happened?+_

_+Shepard's wounded!+_

Madison stood and sprinted to the indicator on the other wall. Jacob turned and started yelling after her. "What are you doing? We have to get this door closed first!"

_+I'm fine, Madison! Don't worry about me!+_

_+How bad is it, Garrus?+_

_+Did you hear what I just said?+_

_+She's really ok, Madison. She just got a dent in her helmet. We can't hold them off, though.+_

"Madison!" Jacob roared.

"You can wait!" she barked back.

_+Garrus! Harbinger!+_

_+Got it!+_

Madison got the door open. Samara came in first firing biotics at every living thing behind her. Garrus came second, holding Shepard over his shoulder while firing his assault rifle. Shepard was kicking and punching his back, trying to make him put her down. She had a large dent in her helmet. There was no penetration but would probably leave a bruise.

Garrus put her down, using his free hand to take out his sniper rifle. Some of the fire team went to assist him and Shepard.

Shepard took out her pistol. "Shoot Harbinger, god damn it!"

The glowing Collector lept over the cover, running towards the doors.

"I'm coming, Garrus!"

Shepard stood next to Garrus, helping him by pulling out her own sniper rifle.

"Concussive round!"

A glowing round shot out of Shepard's gun, instantly killing Harbinger. His body bounced back, disintegrating into thin air. Everyone knew that he would possess another Collector soon, though.

"Madison! Close the doors!" Shepard barked.

Madison hit the right sequence, and the doors began to slowly come together. Madison groaned and lunged foreword, hoping to force the doors to close faster. Mordin ran to the other side, aiding her in her efforts.

"Fire at anything and everything that moves!" Shepard yelled. "Don't let up!"

The team obeyed as Mordin and Madison worked to close the door. Mordin peaked out the door and saw Harbinger possess another Collector. Harbinger lifted his gun and aimed at Madison's exposed head.

"Watch out!"

He jumped foreword and knocked Madison to the ground. The bullet grazed his back and hit Samara in the thigh, blood oozing from the wound. She fell to the ground and wrapped her hands around it, obviously feeling extreme pain. When the doors met, Madison pushed Mordin off of her and rushed to Samara's side.

A silence fell over the group as they absorbed the first wounded. Madison withdrew a medi-gel and distributed it to Samara. Mordin just stood and watched her. Thanking the gods of all religions that they had spared her of any casualties. She reached for Samara's hand and lifted her to her feet. Samara accepted the offered help.

"We need to move," Shepard said, helping Madison. "We can't just stand around all day."

**SSV Normandy, Two Years previously**

"I've heard so much about you. Shepard cares a lot about you."

"Well, she must be very fond of you, then. She never really talks about me to people she doesn't trust."

Garrus' mandibles shuddered slightly, probably a turian blush. Madison turned to go talk to other crew members.

She was met by Kaiden Alenko.

"It's good to finally meet you. I can see the resemblance between you two."

"Oh, so I see she's fond of you as well?"

"What sort of trouble are you stirring up, baby doll?" Shepard chimed in as Garrus rubbed the flesh under his fringe and Kaiden got a confused look on his face. Obviously, her mom had slept with Kaiden. Why wouldn't she? He seemed like a nice enough guy. Not too bad to look at, either. But Garrus seemed interested in her as well. Garrus was more her type.

Such a tough decision.

Kaiden or Garrus?

"Shepard," she and Madison turned to see Anderson readying a camera for a group photo. She turned back to Madison and took her hands in hers.

Madison could clearly see what her mother was wanting. "Madison…?"

Madison felt color rising to her cheeks. She hated pictures, but she also felt like she didn't have anything to do with the defeat of Sovereign. She didn't deserve to be in the picture.

"…Mom…"

"Madison, please?"

Madison looked at the crew, lined up ready for the picture. They seemed to be welcoming her into the picture. Did half of them even know who she was? How many people did her mom tell?

"You're the reason I'm fighting."

**Earth, Two Months Later**

"The casualty list includes Commander Jane Shepard. A human spectre and defeater of Reapers."

Madison stared at the screen. No thought crossed her mind. She just heard those words, echoing through her mind. Never ceasing.

"…body has not been found..."

…Casualty…Shepard…Jane…Commander Jane Shepard pronounced dead…

"…no reports of any war ships in the area…"

Why? Why her? Why not anybody else? What did it matter if someone else died in her place? At least she would be alive.

Madison stood up, turning off the television in the process. She picked up her school bag and books. She headed for the door but was stopped by Julia's voice. "Honey, where are you going?"

"I'm going to school…" she said, in a monotone voice. "Isn't it Wednesday?"

"Well, yeah, but…" Julia sighed. "Don't you want to just relax for a bit and mourn your loss?"

"That's just a sign of weakness."

Julia stepped foreword and grabbed her hand. "But, baby, it'll make you stronger. You need time to rest and process all that's happened."

"And what good will that do? That won't bring her back."

"It won't, but it'll help make the pain less painful."

"Pain is only an option. And I will not submit to it."

She pulled herself out of Julia's grip and headed out the door.

_You're the reason I'm fighting._

**SR-2 Normandy, Two Years Later, Five and a Half Months before the Collector Base**

Mordin pulled his thoughts from a distant lifetime ago and rejoined the present. It was in the Tech Lab of the _Normandy _that he felt most comfortable. Usually, he was alone in the silence. Alone, yet surrounded by Cerberus officials. It felt a little unsettling to him.

The only problem he could find was that it gave him way too much time to think.

His fingers danced over the console, typing in data about side projects he was working on. He listed all the possibilities in his head, making no mistakes. The whole time he was in his clinic on Omega, he had never thought about the genophage, and he had hoped that would remain in the _Normandy_, as well.

But now, since there was all this free time again, his mind began to wander down the dark alleys of his mind.

How could-

"You're not listening to me."

Mordin's head lifted, and his eyes met Madison's. She was standing next to the upgrades computer and had an eyebrow raised at him. He couldn't think of how long she had been standing there trying to get his full attention. He nodded to her.

"Sorry. Was distracted with important research."

"…Right…I just wanted you to check out something that I discovered."

"Of course. Let me see," he left his station and approached the computer. He stared at the screen as she pulled up her research.

"It's a medical upgrade."

"Hmm. Interesting."

Madison pulled up the schematics of the armor. "I call it Emergency Shielding. The emitters will be optimized to restore the shields of the whole team completely. We won't be able to run two emitters, because of interference, but when a kinetic barrier is down, another will be able to be activated. This will make it almost impossible to reactivate the primary barrier, however. Hmm. What do you think?"

Mordin pressed a fist to his mouth. "Try reconfiguring."

Madison nodded and began typing again. He saw as she put together advanced mathematics and science laws, almost as fast as he would have. Ever sense Shepard recruited Mordin, Madison had been visiting the Tech Lab frequently, "to do some research" she had claimed.

Mordin fought back an approving smile as he watched her study the information. He had never met another person with such enthusiasm since the genophage project. She was an angry person, no doubt, but she was also determined and strong. She had obviously made mistakes and made herself learn from them. From what Mordin had seen, she tried to never let her enemies get the best of her.

Mordin thought that she was a little adorable.

"You're drifting off again."

Mordin focused and saw that she was staring at him with an annoyance in her eyes. "Sorry. You were saying?"

"Don't worry about me," she said. "You've been more distant lately. Is something wrong?"

"Nothing. Tests. Need to be run. Now, What were you saying?"

Madison rolled her eyes and turned back to the console. "So, apparently, we're going to Illium."

Mordin frowned in confusion. "What about it?"

"I understand that it's an…asari world. And it's also the main base of information. Like an archive or something like that," Madison began, shrugging. "I know, that my mom's going there for an assassin and a justicar, but one of my mom's old teammates, Liara T'Soni, lives there as well. She works as an information broker. I wander if my mom expects her to join or something?" Mordin didn't understand where she was going with this. "And then there's Garrus who just came along eagerly, no surprise there. But then Kaiden refused to come and my mom got so pissed…"

She shook her head. "It's like, what did she expect? Everyone has their own lives to worry about. They've become apart of other groups. Some have got families to look after now….Kaiden is a Commander." she closed her eyes. "How can she…?" she stopped typing and turned to Mordin, anger burning in her eyes. "How can she expect everyone to just drop everything and help her? They've got other priorities now! I just feel so…angry!"

"Angry. At your mother?"

"Yeah! But not just her. At the insanity of it all. It's been two years! Does she expect everything to just go back to normal? To just be _fine_?" she threw her hands up. "Did she really think that everyone would regroup to help her defend the galaxy once again? It's like she's not hearing what anyone has been telling her! It's been two fucking years, Mordin! It may have just been a few minutes for her, but not for me, and…for you. She can't possibly imagine what everyone's been through. Everyone's changed."

Mordin widened his eyes. "You've changed?"

Madison glared at him but nodded. She laughed for a minute at his joke. He smiled as he could physically see the stress and loathing leave her body.

"Hmm. Hard not to imagine you without anger."

"I know," she commented. "I wasn't always this angry, though. I used to be very laid back and I didn't care much for getting anything done. But I find myself taking my anger out on you, now," she went back to typing. "Sorry about that."

Mordin would've raised a brow if he had one. She had never apologized for anything before. She certainly had changed since the time they had first met.

"No harm done. Relieved stress. Always good."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean it was okay."

"Like I said. No harm done," he replied quickly. He did not want her angry again. It was kind of cute sometimes, but he liked it better when she was at least a little sober.

"But what do you think of all this?" she asked, turning back towards him.

"No thought. Completely neutral towards everything." _Don't want this._

"Of course, but I just want to know how you feel about it."

Mordin ignored her and walked back to his own console. "No, no, no. Plan to remain neutral."

"Fine then," she left her console and rested her hands on his desk. "Let's talk about you, then. What are you always thinking about that makes you ignore me?"

"Nothing to say."

"Maybe there isn't, but I want to know anyway."

Mordin continued to type, ignoring her.

"You're _really_ pissing me off right now," her voice raised, and he felt almost all of his courage leave him. "You're the only person I actually trust on this ship besides Jack, and even then, she creeps me out!"

He looked up to her and saw her disapproving glare. He took to pacing.

"Thinking…about a past life."

Her brows furrowed, and he began to explain.

"Work on the genophage. My team."

She sighed. "Is that all you ever think about? You already told me about everything. You bragged about how much fun it was. Said it was the best time of your life. I haven't judged you for it. Why are you worried about telling me, now?"

He turned to her with a slight scowl on his face. He wasn't angry with her. Just frustrated. "There's more to it than that."

"Like what?"

"Do you expect me to explain _everything _to you?"

"Hmm?" she pondered. She lifted a hand and brushed it through her hair. "I'm not the salarian scientist here."

"No, no, no," he shook his head. "Not what I meant," He didn't know how to make her understand. What to ask. "Mistakes. Sad events. How do you live with them?"

"…Are you saying you regret your work?"

He ignored her and got strangely transfixed by something on his omni-tool.

"You do? What do you want me to say? Am I just-"

"Never regret anything," Mordin explained. "Just want opinion."

"I just…don't."

Mordin looked back at her. "Don't understand. No regrets? No burdens?"

"Not really," she said. She leaned on the table behind her. "I let things change me. I don't regret anything I've ever done because I forgive myself and everyone that was involved. It makes it easier. Kind of a lighter load to carry. I just kind of move on. Once it's done, it's done. There's no changing anything."

Mordin continued to stare at her…her face was full of absolution, such sureness. Mordin made sure to remember that face.

"I know that sounds kind of bad, Mordin. But I just don't like dealing with all those conflicting emotions. There's no point to them. Most of the people I've wronged or have wronged me, I never even see or think about them anymore. Guilt and regret are just useless feelings to me."

Madison walked back to her console, Mordin still absorbing the woman he was seeing before him. She was one of the strongest people he'd ever met, if a bit hot-headed. She couldn't be as icy all the time, though. There must be times when she let her emotions flow. Mordin prayed for the day that she would trust him enough to show him.

He wanted to know her. He wanted her to know him.


	4. Mr Brightside

Chapter 4

_"I just can't look. It's killing me." - The Killers_

**The Collector Base, The Long Walk**

She stood, staring into the pod with an unreadable expression. He stepped beside her and touched her shoulder to let her know he was there. She didn't acknowledge him, just simply stared ahead. The others stayed back, tending to the other traumatized crew members. Thane was going to lead them and Samara back to safety soon.

Mordin stared with her at the yellowish blood-stained glass. He glanced at Madison's face. He could only imagine what she was thinking. He wondered if she had ever seen anything like that. He didn't know what to do.

He didn't care much for romantic actions. From what he could tell, she didn't either. He had never had a partner before in his life, but he knew that he should show some sign of affection or comfort towards her. Just to relax her.

He brought his hand up and pressed it to her cheek, his fingers entangling in her hair. She turned to him and grabbed his other hand.

A slight frown appeared on her face.

"You should go in Thane's place."

"Don't understand," he said. He didn't think she would've said something like that.

"You should go. You'll be safer in the _Normandy_. And…it would make me feel better if you were safe. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you now."

He laughed bitterly. "Whole fire team with me. Should be more worried about you. Only have Tali, Legion, and mother. If my decision, everyone would be with you."

"That wouldn't do you any good, though," she laughed with him. "You may be very skilled in combat, but not by yourself against an army. I can't even do that alone."

They stared into each other's eyes, absorbing their emotions.

They tightened their grip on each other. "Samara was shot. Who knows what'll happen next." she made sure he understood. "Please, don't join her."

He rested his forehead against hers.

"No need to worry."

He truly meant it.

**Normandy SR2, Four and a Half Months Previously**

"Hmm. Tests."

Madison put a cup of tea in front of him on the table, sitting down in the chair opposite of him. She blew on it before taking a sip of the herbal substance. He just kept his hand around the handle as he examined the different data pads in front of him. The mess hall was quiet this time of night, and they were taking advantage.

"Need more biotic upgrades. Been focusing too much on weapons and tech. Will help balance everything out."

"I have a schematic here for a Hyper-Amp. More powerful mass effect fields can be generated, causing more damage."

"Hmm. Need more defensive upgrades," Mordin commented.

"But we haven't found any defensive biotic schematics."

"Make some."

"You know that I'm not smart enough for that. We'll put this in the 'maybe' pile, but we need to seriously consider it, we're kind of low on biotic upgrades," She started a pile with the data pad.

"Here. Have krogan shotgun from Grunt. Wanted us to make it, " Mordin began, picking up another schematic. "Very powerful. However, only he benefits. Doesn't seem very practical."

"Alright then. It's in the 'no' pile. Grunt will be pissed," Madison made another pile. "This Medical VI schematic is going there to."

Mordin choked on the sip he was taking. "No. Why? Gives the team full health. Also separates medi-gel into two layers. Active and Passive."

"Mordin, I have that Emergency Shielding schematic. It should be done in about a month. It'll be pretty damn awesome," Madison explained, putting the schematic in the pile with the shotgun.

Mordin smiled. "Thought you were stupid."

"Well, you know, I can't let you have all the fun," she lifted her hands in defense. "I lied!" she examined another schematic. "You're kinda rubbing off on me."

"Hmm?"

"Oh. It's a human expression. You know whenever you hang around someone so much that you kind of start becoming like them," she took a huge gulp of her tea. "I know it sounds creepy, but it really isn't it just sounds like it."

"Hmm. Doesn't make sense. Impossible to become someone else."

Madison smiled at him. "You'd be surprised."

Mordin raised a brow. "Try me."

"Come on, Mordin!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands on the table. "The moment I first spoke to you, I hated everything about you. Now, we're with each other almost twenty four seven. Even on missions my mom will take both of us instead of just one of us," she brought her knees up and rested her chin on them. "It's like we're useless without the other."

"Seems logical. But still impossible," he pointed out.

"Fine! I'll put in evidence," she brought up her hands, ready to count. "We're both _brilliant_ when it comes to science. We each served in a military type position. We're both stealthy. The only difference I can find is that you're a salarian and I'm a human."

"And I'm much more good looking."

He enjoyed laughing after he saw the look on her face.

"I refuse to say anything else on this subject!" she interjected sarcastically. "I hope you're happy. I guess I'll spend the rest of my days with Jack. You've lost the only friend you will ever have!"

"Can make other friends better than you."

She continued, waving her hands around dramatically. "And I'll be with Jack, probably getting brutally murdered. And what will you do? You'll fall on your knees and burst into tears. 'No! She was my only friend!' you'll say. And it would be all your fault." she grabbed another data pad. "My mom doesn't need this schematic. She doesn't get shot at, anyway. She sends other people in to distract enemies."

"Very true. But might be useful. Put it with 'maybe'," he grabbed the schematic and put it in the appropriate pile.

Madison picked up another schematic, not really studying it. "…Why don't we just create giant mechs and see how the Collectors deal with that?"

"Please. Don't even joke. Not enough resources or time. Would take months. Even years," Mordin went through all the possibilities in his head.

Madison looked back at him. "…You're so weird. And yet I'm ok with that."

"Glad to hear it," he replied. "Don't like following the crowd. Always leads to uncomfortable situations."

"We can make up our own crowd Mordin," she replied. "We'll kick ass."

She studied the schematic some more before tossing it into the rejection side of the table.

"What was that?"

"The Multicore Implants Jack gave us. Sorry, but I think she has enough power, and when she decides to kill us all, we need to take her down easily."

"Too weak for her?" Mordin asked.

Madison glared at him. "Don't you even start with me, Mordin."

Mordin laughed and handed her another schematic.

"Oh, fuck no, Mordin!" she yelled throwing it in the rejection pile.

"What's wrong with the Argus Scanner Array? Will greatly increase planet-scanning. Time is precious. Doubly so, these days."

"We'd waste time just _building _it!" Madison rubbed her face with her hands. "We shouldn't waste minerals on it! We do just fine collecting minerals. We have an abundance of them. And even then we don't use them unless the upgrade is truly worth it."

"You should rethink it," Mordin advised. "Will regret decision."

"A no it is, then," she said. "This is pretty easy. Oh and this Dermal Regeneration's gone to."

"What? Why? Need a better medical facility if we get hurt."

"There are no small med-bays, only small doctors. Doctor Chakwas is excellent at her job and so are you. I think we'll be fine as long as no one dies."

"It's a strong possibility. No one lives forever."

"Very true," she commented. "_But _we also have Cerberus on our side. And apparently they can bring people back to life now. So, yeah, we're going to be fine."

Thane appeared from around the corner and was heading to the kitchen. Madison immediately fixed herself in a proper position in her chair. She grabbed a schematic and began reading it, trying to appear smart. He walked by and grabbed a cup of tea before walking by them again. He nodded at Madison. Madison smiled sweetly and waved at him.

The minute Thane left the room she turned back to Mordin, who had a confused look on his face.

"That was nothing. I was just…You know…well…Yeah…" she tried to explain. "That's exactly what's going on."

"No need to explain," he said, raising his hands. "Thane is probably very appealing to human standard. Definitely your type. Seems like you two get along fine."

"I…I guess," she said, she had a confused look in her eyes. "I mean he's very sweet and strong and just…I don't know…I think I might feel something for him."

Mordin could feel his heart shattering in his chest. He couldn't really explain it. He was happy that everyone was trying to find hope in these dark times. Shepard had Garrus. Joker had EDI, in a strange sense. And now, Madison had Thane.

Yet he had no one waiting for him.

No. He couldn't think of Madison in this way. They were on a mission. Plus, he was much older than her. He had no right to think that she could ever love him. He paused. Love? When had love ever become an option. Salarians had no concept for that sort of feeling.

Madison noticed his silence. "Is something wrong, Mordin?"

"Hmm, no, no, no. Just lost in thought. Trying to remember where I put my omni-tool schematics. If you'll excuse me."

Mordin stood abruptly and turned the corner, more than likely, heading to the lab. Madison thought of what he said.

_Trying to remember where I put my omni-tool schematics._

Madison furrowed her brows. "We made that months ago…"

Madison got up to follow him when she noticed Samara standing by the hall. She shook her head.

"Madison, you're a smart young woman, but you can be very blind at times," Samara commented.

Madison widened her eyes. "What are you talking about, Samara?"

The justicar shook her head and continued to get a cup of tea from the pot in the kitchen.

_Why does everyone like my tea? It tastes like shit._

"Everyone thought you guys we're a a couple and just having a very difficult time hiding it," Samara told her, waving her hand dismissively. "I didn't realize it was _this _bad."

Madison stared blankly at the asari. "…You mean…me and Mordin…Together?" she tried to process what Samara was telling her. "In a couple sense?….What the fuck are you talking about?"

Samara shook her head and started to walk back to the Starboard Observation. Passing by Madison, she turned her head to her. "Never mind that. Just keep your eyes open from now on. As your mentor, I'm making this a lesson," Samara continued. "Your time is precious. Spend it wisely. And with those who care for you."

And with that, Samara left the room, leaving an intensely confused Madison in her wake


	5. Iris

Chapter 5

_"I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand." - Goo Goo Dolls_

**The Collector Base, The Long Walk**

"Tali, Legion, I don't want you to leave the back of the biotic bubble. Watch Madison's back. Remember, if she dies, we all die. Or I kill you myself. Madison, you stay directly behind me. No one goes ahead of me." Shepard reloaded her sniper rifle. "Miranda, you're relieving Jacob. The rest of you will be under her command. Understood?"

"Whatever," Jack muttered. She strolled past Madison towards the path everyone else was going down.

Mordin turned to follow her but Madison stopped him. "Mordin, can we talk for a second?"

Miranda turned towards him. She nodded in understanding and continued to lead the rest of the team down the path.

"What's wrong? Not ready?"

"Not really," Madison said, gravely. "I'm actually terrified."

"Treat it like any other mission," he advised. "We'll all be fine, Madison."

"This isn't like any other mission," she argued. "All the other missions we're easy, less life threatening. We're practically surrounded by our enemy, any of us could die."

"It won't be me…or you,"

"We don't know that, Mordin."

"_I _know, Madison!" he yelled, trying to reassure her. "We can conquer this. Save the galaxy. No harm will come to you! I promise you!"

She stepped forward and hugged him tightly around his waist. The surprise of the gesture sent him back a step, but he immediately returned it, pressing one hand into the small of her back and the other on the back of her head. They sat for a minute with their eyes closed, their grip tightening with each second that ticked by.

She pulled back and held his head in her hands, her eyes close to tears and his face holding an expression of deep sorrow. He brushed his lips against hers, feeling every particle in his body shudder at the touch. "I want to go with you."

"You'll be in more danger than you realize, Mordin," she said, her thumbs caressing his cheeks.

He tilted his head so that he was touching her forehead. "Don't care. Don't care if I die. Just want you to be safe. Want to be with you."

He held her, her back arching against the pressure. "You _will _be with me, Mordin. Just not right now. If you die, Mordin, I'm going to die with you."

He laughed bitterly and shook his head. "Too many people need you. Too important. Mother wouldn't allow it."

Madison brought her hands down to rest on his chest. He relaxed and his hands rested on the small of her back. They stared into each others eyes. Her mouth kept opening and closing, wanting to say the words that she had been wanting to say for so long. Words she had never shared with anyone else.

Mordin knew what she was going to say, and stopped her before she uttered a single word.

"Stop. Please."

Her tear-filled eyes widened.

He reached up and caressed her cheek before backing away from her.

"Don't say it. Will make it harder. Just don't," he turned away, heading down the path the fire team went down. "Not goodbye. Won't ever be goodbye."

She turned and watched him follow the path. She closed her eyes, shook her head, and stared down the path she would take. With one final glance at the retreating back of Mordin, she walked down the path after her mother.

_He's right. It's not goodbye._

Of course, death was indiscriminate. It didn't care who it was or when it was. It didn't care if you had said goodbye or not. It didn't even care if you held them or not. It was unavoidable. Just a one-way path. Even her mother couldn't avoid it. She cheated death, though. So it wasn't really fair. However, death was still unavoidable.

Death changed people. It changed her mom. It even changed Madison, and she wasn't the one that died.

**Tuchanka, Krogan Hospital Interior, Four Months Previously**

"Sterile Weyrloc female willing to risk procedure. Pointless. Pointless waste of life."

He looked up and stared at Madison, just as quiet since they entered the hospital. It was her mother that broke the eerie silence. "I didn't expect you to be disturbed by the sight of a dead krogan."

"What? Why?" Mordin began, his voice full of surprise. He looked at Madison, but she had her eyes on the ground. She intended to stay silent. Why, he wouldn't ever be able to tell. "Because of genophage work? No, causative."

"Never experimented on live krogan. Never killed with medicine. Her death not my work, only reaction to it," he justified. He kept making glances to Madison, wanting her to help. But she refused to pick a side. "Goal was to stabilize population. Never wanted this. Can see it logically…but still unnecessary. Pointless waste of life. Hate to see it."

He looked back up to Madison. She was staring at him now, her expression full of concern. She was pure, innocent. Had no blood on her hands. She deserved a better man than he. She was disgusted by his actions. She would never say it aloud, but he knew that's what she truly felt.

"I didn't think you'd had that much direct contact with things like this. Did you come to Tuchanka after dropping your plague?" Shepard asked. Mordin flinched at the word 'plague'. He wouldn't have called it that. But that's what Madison and Shepard called it. It made his heart ache in his chest.

"Yearly recon missions. Water. Tissue Samples. Insured no mistakes. Superiors offered to carry it on. Refused. Need to see it in person," he said, pain obvious in his voice. "Need to look. Need to see. Accept it as necessary. See small picture. Remind myself why I run a clinic on Omega." He glanced at Madison. She was so far away from him. He wanted, _needed_ her closer. He lifted his hand over the krogan. "Rest, young mother. Find your gods. Find someplace better."

"I didn't expect spirituality from you, Mordin," Shepard commented.

"Genophage modification project altered millions of lives. Then saw results. Ego, humility, juxtaposition. Frailty of life. Size of universe. Explored religions after work completed. Different races. No answers. Many questions."

"Sounds like you were trying to deal with your guilty conscience. The doctor who killed millions."

"Modified genophage project great in scope. Scientifically brilliant. But ethically difficult. Krogan reaction visceral. Tragic." he explained, glancing to Madison. He wanted her to say something. Anything. He just wanted to know that she was aware of what he was trying to say. "Not guilty, but responsible. Trained as doctor. Genophage affects fertility. Doesn't kill." He was soully trying to convince Madison. And himself. "Still, caused this. Hard to see big picture behind pile of corpses."

"Can you really just rationalize it all away? How do you justify it?" Shepard said, venom lining her words.

Mordin inhaled deeply before answering. "Wheel of life. Popular salarian concept. Similar to human Hinduism in focus on reincarnation. Appealing to see life as endless. Fix mistakes in next life. Learn, adapt, improve. Refuse to believe life ends here," he gestured toward the krogan. "Too wasteful. Have more to offer. Mistakes to fix. Cannot end here. Could do so much more."

He was just staring into Madison's eyes. Trying to convince her. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, what she thought of him now. He didn't know if she hated him or was just trying to remain neutral. Maybe she just didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore.

He wanted her to know him, but he was wondering if that was a mistake.

"If you need this much soul searching to get over it, maybe the genophage was wrong," Shepard protested.

"Had to be done. Rachni Wars, Krogan Rebellions, all pointed to krogan aggression. So many simulations. Effects of krogan population increase. All pointed to war. Extinction," he tried to defend himself more. "Genophage or genocide. Save galaxy from krogan. Save krogan from galaxy."

Madison nodded but still said nothing. She could see why he'd done it, but still thought it was wrong.

"You could've cured the genophage, instead. Brought hope to the krogan. They'd have rejoiced."

"Assumes human reaction. Krogan stimulus response different. Harsh environment. Take chance to fight, flee," he explained. "Would've caused chaos on Tuchanka. Victor would have war economy. Bloodthirsty army. Galactic expansion only logical outcome. More war. Genophage saved lives war would've ended."

Madison came closer, situating herself before the krogan. She folded her hands as though she were about to say a prayer. Her mother stood and stared for a second. She smiled approvingly and joined Madison. Mordin stared at her, contemplating whether he had the right to join or not. She looked so beautiful in that moment. So innocent. She _definitely_ deserved a much better man than he.

"Dear, Heveanly Father. I ask you to help this krogan find her way to your heavenly gates. Have mercy on her soul, for like everyone around her, she has sinned and felt great sorrow. May this beautiful being join you and rejoice with you in your paradise."

Mordin continued to stare in awe. He had never heard such beautiful words leave her mouth before.

"Also, guide and protect _us_, Father, as we walk in this once krogan sanctuary. Many dangers lie waiting for us. Help us find Mordin's friend, Maelon. Please, protect him as we search for him."

Shepard nodded and continued to pray with her daughter.

"In Jesus' sweet name I pray, amen."

Shepard and Madison lifted their heads to look at Mordin. He and Madison shared a brief connection with each other. Brief. It ended just as soon as it had been made. And they both mourned the loss.

**Tuchaka, Maelon's Lab, Forty Minutes Later**

"Unacceptable experiments. Unacceptable goals. Won't change. No choice. Have to kill you."

Madison's eyes widened and ran to his side. She grabbed his wrist. "No, Mordin. This isn't like you. You can't do this. You'll regret it so much. And…you'll change. I don't want you to!"

Mordin stared at the man before him, ignoring Madison. Madison hadn't said a single word since they came there and now she was deeming it appropriate to speak. She had no right. It was his decision. He had to do it.

Jane and Madison we're both very different people. Jane used to be very unmerciful. Killed anyone and everything that got in her way. She didn't care what decisions anyone made. If they didn't affect her or her mission, she didn't care. Those we're their decisions, and she respected them no matter what.

She had made decisions that some would consider terrible during her time stopping Saren. She didn't have much of a relationship with any of her crew members, being a mean person. She had killed the asari on the worlds of Virmire and Feros. Even killed her teammate, Wrex, on Virmire as well. She didn't care who it was she had to kill.

Then there was Madison.

She was just as mean a person as her mother was. She hadn't made very many friends on the _Normandy_. The only people she normally talked to were Samara, Thane, and himself. She used to associate with Jack, but that quickly changed when she decided to blow up a Cerberus facility. Now, she was almost deathly afraid of her. Madison didn't care much for anyone else. However, she cared for the ones she was closest to.

Anytime she made a mistake, she lived up to it. And when she made a decision, that was it. There was no convincing her otherwise. It was very hypocritical of her, but that was the way she was.

Mordin turned his head and met eyes with her. She just stared back, pleading for him to stop. He didn't know what to do. His mind and his heart were at war with each other.

He had never let someone get this close to him before. She was making him question everything he had ever done, every decision he had ever made. It was all her fault. He couldn't stand it. She was in his head. And she wouldn't ever leave. Calling to him. Pleading to him. Her voice full of pain and despair.

He made a mistake.

He shook his head and went back to the situation at hand. He tightened his grip on the gun.

He would not let her sway him.

"Mom, please!"

"She's right, Mordin. You don't need to do this. You're not a murderer."

He took in a breath at the realization. He didn't want to murder Maelon. He didn't want Madison to never speak to him again. He needed her. "No. Not a murderer." He dropped the gun and backed away from his former student. "Finished Maelon. Get out. No Weyrloc left. Project over."

Maelon began to walk away. Before he could go two steps, though, Madison punched him square in the jaw. "That's the least you deserve. Now, get out."

Maelon held his jaw in pain as he ran out of the room. Madison glared at him as he left.

Mordin stared at her as she turned back to him. "Sorry, but that really relieved me."

Shepard laughed and began to leave the room.

"Will save data," Mordin told her. "For the krogan."

"I'm very glad you're choosing this, Mordin."

"Thank you," Mordin said, slowly approaching her. "For everything."

Mordin wrapped his arms around her, closing his eyes. He inhaled her smell, her appearance, everything about her. She was the most beautiful being he had ever come into contact with. Flawed, but beautiful. She was everything that he had ever wanted. He didn't even realize it.

She reached up and wrapped her arms around him. They were in perfect harmony, and they cherished it.

Mordin had finally felt at least a little at peace with himself.

And she was the reason.

**Normandy SR2, Four Hours Later**

Madison burst through the doors of the Tech Lab, looking like she just wanted to beat the hell out of somebody. Mordin looked up in surprise. "Madison?"

She ignored him and went straight to her console, typing away. Most of it was just nonsense, anger was probably controlling her. She was definitely very upset.

"Are you okay?"

"No, Mordin," she said, agitation filling her being. "I am _so far_ from being okay right now!" She turned away from her console and went to examine other things around the lab. "And guess who the cause of all this is?"

"Who?"

"Fucking Thane," she commented angrily. She went back to her console like it held the meaning of life. "He asked me if I could get my mom to help his son or some shit on the Citadel. We were going there for Garrus anyway, that fucking asshole."

"Son? Didn't know Thane had a son," Mordin approached her and watched as she put some folders in the delete bin.

"Turns out _nobody_ has the balls to walk up to my mom and ask her for something," she turned sharply to him. She looked so angry that Mordin thought she might explode. "And I _mean _nobody. The only ones that actually asked my mom for something was you, Grunt, and Garrus. I mean, come on. My mom needs to get a crew with fucking raw courage." she cocked her hip and folded her arms. "Do they think I'm related to Kelly or something?"

"Impossible. Share no genes with her."

"Yeah, but my mom looks like her," she commented. "Maybe they think they're related, thus I'm related."

"Hmm. Almost look alike. Differences are obvious, though. Why?"

"I just wanna know why people think I actually _give a fuck _about their problems," she crossed around him and sat on his desk, messaging her temples.

"Can't _actually_ believe that. Do you?"

"Oh, I _don't_," she laughed as she said the words. "What do they expect me to do? It's not like my mom will say no to them or something."

Mordin brought a fist to his mouth. "Probably think Shepard's cold. Would refuse."

"I guess," she sighed. "I mean I'll do it anyway. It's no big deal, but…"

"Hmm?"

"I just don't know why they have to ask _me_…" She stood and went to thoroughly examine the drive core. Mordin joined her, and he could practically feel the anger radiating off of her.

"You know, I helped out Miranda by telling mom about her sister. I mean I get the family shit. So, I tell my mom. My mom helps her. The heartless bitch doesn't even bother to thank me."

"Madison..."

She ignored him and continued. "And then Jack is like 'I wanna blow up a fucking Cerberus facility' because she's a fucking psycho like that and wants to somehow miraculously change what happened and make it better," she leaned on the railing. "So my mom helps her create fucking crater. And she doesn't thank me. Not that I expected it from her but still…"

She sighed and folded her arms. "Then Jacob's father suddenly shows up out of fucking nowhere. So, he decides that he wants me to ask my mom if we can go see what the fuck is up. We go and find out his dad's a dick. And he still doesn't thank me."

Madison turned around and leaned on the railing. "Then Samara, my _mentor_, tells me I need to talk to my mom about her daughter. That her daughter is some sort deformed asari that if you fuck her she kills you. So I talk to my mom again, we go kill this daughter of hers, and like everyone else she somehow forgets to thank me."

She stared into Mordin's eyes. Mordin could tell she was about ready to burst. "And now Thane wants me to talk to my mom about his fucking son. Tells me that he's following the path of his father. Why doesn't he just let his kid do it. If something bad happens to him, there's a lesson learned. His son's probably gonna get in trouble anyway."

Mordin continued to just stare at her. Where did these thoughts come from? How could she think such things? He wondered if she had always had these feelings buried deep inside her and was finally letting them flow out.

"I don't even know if I_ want _to talk to her about it," she said, shrugging. "I just…I don't know. You know, if I don't ever talk to her, if I just forget about it, my mom will probably never know. Maybe he should pluck up some of that assassin courage he has hiding somewhere and fucking ask her himself."

Madison came off the railing and took to pacing. Mordin watched her with concern.

"I'm just so…pissed off!"

"Can see that."

She glared at Mordin before continuing. "You know, it's not like their gonna see their life flash before her eyes and everything they've ever done and all that other shit when they die. You don't see anything when you're about to die…You just…"

Mordin saw her eyes darken and Mordin wanted to hold her to him.

"There's nothing…No light…No visions…_Nothing_…" Madison placed a hand on the place she had been stabbed. "All you see, is what's happening around you. You feel nothing but confusion. Asking yourself what's going on, what just happened, why can't I move." She stayed silent, and Mordin could only imagine what was going through her mind.

"I get that they want to die without regrets, but…" she rubbed her face with her hands.

"But it doesn't even matter in the end," she whispered. "You don't. I'm serious, I'm the experienced one here. It doesn't matter if you think you've lived well. It doesn't matter if you shot up your whole family and feel bed about it or some shit. You…you don't even see or feel anything."

He approached her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Only one who can convince mother to do anything. No one else can. Why they come to you for help. May not be grateful. But who cares. You need no one, Madison. And that's what makes you great. You can face anything by yourself and come out unscathed."

She moved slightly away from him.

"I'm sorry, for everything that has ever hurt you," he said, truly meaning every word. "Won't ask or force out of you. But you are strong. Passionate. Lovely. Can do anything if you put your soul into it. No one else like you in this universe. No one could ever hope to match your greatness."

There was a string of silence in the air.

"That's a load of shit, Mordin," but there was a playful grin on her face. He smiled with her.

"Happy to-"

Everything froze around him as she reached up and touched his face. She traced his jaw, and he focused on those small points of sensation.

"Thank you," she said, softly. "For listening and…" she closed her eyes, showing that lovely smile of hers. "For everything. You never even had to deal with me and yet you have. Thank you so much."

_Wanted to, _his heart wanted to scream it to the heavens. _Would do anything for you. All you need to do is ask._

"I…" he cleared his throat. "Madison…Was honored before to just be friend and fight along side you. But in awe to be your shoulder."

Madison opened her beautiful green eyes, full of an emotion that he could not yet comprehend.

Mordin felt protective instinct take over him, which surprised him. Salarians weren't really the type to become protective over their females. There was no need for it since they weren't able to keep up with the emotional feeling of love.

Turians we're almost the opposite. Turian females were smaller, stealthier, and more flexible than the males. The males we're usually very dominant and protected their females against any odds. They were the life givers and mothers of their race, after all.

Asari were monogendered. They were the only race that could mate with any race or sex. They were gentler than most races. Like the salarians, they did not have much of a feel for love. They only mated strictly for reproductive purposes.

Krogans often fought over the females. Krogan tried to establish dominance through fighting, and krogan females would mate only with the krogan that had succeeded in battle because they would prove a worthy father to train their sons.

Humans seemed to be different from all other races. The only thing to tell a human male or human female apart was their reproductive organs. Other than that, there would be no way to tell them apart.

Both male and female humans could be in the military and we're treated the same on and off the field of battle. But the males still felt dominance over the females in some situations. Most of the females seemed smarter than the males, but not all males were dumb. Females also tended to be more sensitive. Seeing Madison before him, vulnerable, reared up a protective instinct in him which surprised him greatly.

He wanted to protect her against anything and everything.

He found himself wanting to wrap his arms around her and shield her from all the dangers this universe had to offer. He wanted to be her shelter. Her resting place when she was hurt. He wanted to take care of her and lift the pain from her shoulders.

He wanted to be her everything.

But he knew that would never be possible.

She showed her lovely smile once more, her cheeks becoming redder. "Mordin…I…Thank you. I'm glad I have someone like you to lean on."

_Forever, _he promised. "If you die, I'll die with you."

It wash't until she raised her brows that he realized he had said it out loud. He stiffened as he waited for her to walk away, to tell him she didn't share his feelings. But she just laughed bitterly. Sadly.

"How can I be so selfish?" she asked herself. "I wouldn't mind dying with you."

Mordin felt like falling to his knees and begging this woman to show mercy on him.

"I don't want to die anymore, Mordin…" she said. "I don't. And I'm not going to let you die," she lifted her hands up to his face. "The Collectors are fucked."

Mordin tried to understand what she was saying. Before he realized what he was doing, he had his hands around her back, pulling her closer. Her eyes fluttered closed. He wondered if he should kiss her. Unlike turians or krogan, salarians had the lips to do so. So did humans. But he didn't know if she would accept the gesture or not.

But like the connection they had shared in the krogan hospital, It was gone before it had even started. Before he could decide what he wanted. The corners of her mouth twitched upwards in a slightly understanding smile.

He stepped back away from her, "Must get back to work. Have to study more on Collectors to ensure success in final battle."

She laughed. "That would probably be better for both of us." She backed away from him as well, widening the distance between them. He mourned the loss, wanting to reach out and pull her back towards him. "I should probably go and pull all those files out of the delete bin or we're going to have some _very_ angry crew mates banging on our door."

He wanted to jump out of the nearest air lock for being so stupid. Instead he just passed her, going to his own console. "Good idea. Would probably kill everyone, leaving no crew to help your mother."

When she laughed, he saw something in her eyes. Something he had never taken the time to figure out. Something dark and completely empty, like a black hole.

But as he continued to examine them, the black hole became smaller and smaller. And was replaced with a blinding light that left him admiring the beauty of it.


	6. Slow Me Down

Chapter 6

_"I'm falling apart." - Emmy Rossum_

**The Collector Base, The Long Walk**

"God damn it!"

Yet again, she was thrown into more pain. They had a long discussion about who would be the Biotic Specialist. Miranda and Jacob were both more suited for leadership. Samara would've been the specialist, but she had been shot. Jack was specialized in offensive biotics, not defensive. She wouldn't have been able to keep the bubble up long enough. The only one left was Madison. She was Samara's student, so she was trained at least. But despite her mom encouraging her that everything would be fine, she was in the most pain she had ever been in.

Her muscles felt like they were crushing her bones. All the blood in her body was rushing to her head and flowing out her nose. It felt like something was constantly trying to crush her, and she was using all of her strength to keep it from doing so, causing her to walk at the pace of a turtle. It was hell.

_+Madison. Are you alright?+_

She grunted and nudged for her mother to turn on the comm link of her omni-tool so that she could reply back to Mordin.

_+My whole body feels like it's going to burst. I'm just so fucking alright right now.+_

There was a long silence before she replied again.

_+You know, Mordin, we should- Holy shit fuck!+_

She walked faster to find some cover before a bullet could so much as touch her.

She screamed at her mother, "Mom, I know you're trying really hard, but I kinda need you to try way _way _harder."

_+Madison!+_

Though concern for Mordin rolled through her body, she felt her jaws being closed shut as she tried harder to keep the field up. A concussive round from her mother's shotgun sent a Collector falling off the walkway. Fire burst all around her as Tali and Legion joined her mother. Her mother dropped to one knee to reload her weapon, and Tali continued to fire from her shotgun as well until she had run out of ammo.

_+She's fine, Mordin. Really. She just needs to remain a little more calm.+_

Madison forcefully turned her head to glare at the quarian. She had no right to say anything on how calm Madison should be.

If she were in the position Madison was in, she'd be acting the same way.

_+What's happening on your end, Fire Team?+_

_+My gun is literally evaporating the spit off my hands.+_

_+Shepard, the door isn't that far away.+_

_+Yeah, yeah. Cheerleader's getting ahead of herself. There's absolutely no cover in front of it so most of us will probably be screwed.+_

Shepard stood and shot at the Collectors trying to get to more cover. She was trying to hurry before Madison's muscles gave in to the pressure on them. An amazingly loud sniper shot went off in Madison's right ear and she turned to glare at the geth responsible for it, his geth shield came back to life as he knelt back into cover. Shepard threw him an extra thermal clip.

"Shepard-Commander. The Collectors are distracted for the time being."

She nodded and motioned for the team to huddle closer. "We have to keep moving. We'll all exit cover at the exact same time. Tali, Legion, you'll send out your combat drones, and we'll all pick off any Collectors that remain. Do I make myself clear?"

_+Shepard, we need you to be at those doors as soon as possible.+_

_+Well, Miranda, you have to be prepared for anything. We may or may not be at the doors when you get there. We certainly won't be there if you keep interrupting me when I'm trying to give my team orders!+_

Miranda muttered something in the comm link, but nobody was paying attention to her. Madison looked at each of the faces around her, all examining her own, her mother's was full of worry and concern. Legion was a robot, so therefore, his face showed no expression. She could tell by Tali's body language that she was terrified. Madison wondered if she herself looked pained. She could no longer piece together her thoughts to discern what she felt.

She felt someone brush a hand through her hair. She tried not to focus on it for fear that she might accidentally let go of the bubble. Someone said her name, but she couldn't tell if it was someone there or someone over the comm link. A constant ringing had formed in her ear, making her barely hear anything. She didn't care, though. She inched toward the edge of the cover, ready to get rid of the pain wreaking havoc in her body.

She owed every ounce of confidence in battle to her mother. Her mother would not be very proud to hear it. She didn't want Madison to be like her. A killer. But Madison wasn't a killer. She had changed her in ways Madison had never noticed. Madison went from being a naive child to a woman with purpose.

It had been so sudden for her. First, the realization that she was Commander Shepard's daughter had to grow firm in her mind, that because she shared Shepard's genes, she could, in a sense, be her. She would finish what her mother started. To make her mother see that it all wasn't for nothing. Madison began to see the universe for what it really was for the first time. The universe was a hard, unmerciful place.

When her mother died, all the ugliness of the universe, all the decisions that her mother had made, began to consume her. It was all she could comprehend at the time. She no longer wanted vengeance. She wanted judgement to be passed. She wanted the universe to be purged of all evil. She would kill anyone that wronged others or got in her way. It wasn't until much later that she would figure out that she still had a lot to learn about the universe.

Mordin had shown her the truth when she was too blind to see it. He was the only one who could convince her.

Only because he was the only one that cared for her enough to show her. Show her how her mother had changed. How much her mother regretted every decision she had ever made.

The type of pressure her mother was under. Being a mom and a commander at the same time.

Saving the galaxy from threats that it didn't even know existed.

Madison was terrified.

But she refused to die in this hell.

"Hurry the fuck up, guys!" she yelled. "I'm in fucking pain!"

She started slowly jogging out of cover as they rose out of cover after her. Combat drones passed in her peripheral vision, heading out to distract the Collectors. She focused on keeping the biotic bubble up, her whole body shaking from the mental pain.

Her mothers team remained behind her as she inched foreword, a team that was entrusting her with their lives. Any one of them could die, and it would be her fault. Even she might die. She wouldn't allow it. Months ago, she would've been happy to just die on Omega. But Mordin had saved her and had shown her things she would've never known had she never met him.

He had given her a reason to stay alive.

**The Citadel, Saronis Applications, Two Months Previously**

Madison was trying, but she couldn't hide her annoyance with the asari in front of her. The young asari could feel the anger ooze out of Madison and make it's way towards her. She rubbed the back of her neck, nerves were getting to her.

They had entered the Citadel a couple days ago, and her mother had appointed her and Mordin as the shoppers. They were getting groceries, alcohol, but, most importantly, upgrades. Though she used it to her advantage, everyone was confusing her with the actual Commander Shepard, and it annoyed her. She knew she looked like her mother, but she didn't look _that _much like her mother.

But there was one problem. The asari employee was making it extremely difficult to get the discount Madison required. Madison could tell that she was just afraid of getting in trouble with her boss, but she didn't give a shit. The supposed owner of the store, a salarian, walked up behind the asari.

He studied her for a few seconds and raised a brow.

"Hmm," he pressed a fist to his mouth. "You're Commander Shepard?"

Madison glanced at Mordin, who had a worried look on his face. She turned back to the salarian and nodded. "Why, yes, I am. Do I know you or something?"

"No, but I know you," he commented. "You look different than from what I remember."

Madison nodded in response. She had no idea where she was going to go from there. She was well aware of Mordin staring at her through his peripheral vision.

"So, you're the management of this store?" she finally asked, leaning with her elbows on the counter.

"Yes," he nodded. "Is there a problem?"

"Well, you see, that asari there is just being a little difficult. As a Commander, I don't ask for much. But when I ask for a discount on some upgrades, I find it very disrespectful and rude whenever someone denies me of that."

Madison could tell that this man was a fan of her mother. He was the only one that had "recognized" her without her saying anything.

"Well, I'm sure she meant no disrespect, did you, Kothia?"

"Oh, no, of course not!" she exclaimed. "I have just as much respect for the woman as you do, sir. I just didn't want to get in trouble."

Marab nodded. "It's fine, Kothia. Well, do you think you could maybe give my store an endorsement? I'm sure we could squeeze a discount into it."

Madison nodded and leaned down into the microphone. "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite store on the Citadel," she backed away and smiled at him. "Thank you very much, sir."

"No, no, no. Thank _you_, Commander. Everyone owes you a debt that they won't ever be able to repay."

Madison smiled at him and looked at Mordin. "Why can't more people act like _him_?"

Mordin chuckled as Madison took her place in front of the console.

…

Madison and Mordin watched from afar as Garrus hugged Shepard. They separated and she gave him a smile that so few would ever get to see in their life. She had dealt with Udina to get her spectre status back just so that she could help him. Just by looking, Madison could tell that she loved him very much.

She wasn't just a commander to him. She cared deeply for him. There were very few people in this galaxy that Shepard actually loved, and Garrus was now one of them. Then again, everyone was kind of starting to join that circle.

Her mother certainly had changed.

Madison found her mind wondering back to her own problems. She had been sent information from Liara about who had betrayed her to the Blue Suns. She knew who he was and he was on the Citadel. He had caused her a world of trouble and she wanted him to pay. A volus would be her informant.

Her mother would let her do what needed to be done. She would understand.

"Hey, Mom," she interrupted the moment and her mother turned to her, her brows furrowed. "I need to ask you something."

"What is it, honey?" she looked at Garrus. He nodded and turned away to head back to the _Normandy_. Garrus needed rest. He had been through a very tough few hours.

Madison brought up her omni-tool and pulled up some files. "I don't think I ever told you about Jayden, did I?"

"I seem to have a vague memory of you telling me that you two were going to "relieve stress", but you ended up not going through with it," she said.

Madison felt a blush on her cheeks when she saw Mordin widen his eyes in her peripheral vision. "Well, I got some documents from Liara telling me that he was the one that betrayed me on Omega. He's somewhere on the Citadel, and the only one that knows where he is is a volus that goes by the name of Van Nefna."

"Okay. Van," Shepard said, folding her arms over her chest. "Where can we find him?"

"He's located in the Dark Star Lounge around this time. If I could just-"

Shepard held up a hand to stop her. "Wait, _I_? I don't think you understand that I'm your mother, Madison. The second I enter the room, he'll be pissing in his suit," she jerked her chin at Mordin. "You're coming with us."

Mordin nodded in understanding. "Wouldn't refuse."

"Alrighty then. Let's go interrogate a volus."

**The Citadel, Apartments District, One and a Half Hours Later**

Liara had given her an excellent lead. And her mother wasn't doing so bad, either.

Well, earlier she wasn't.

The second the mission had started, Madison stepped up as the leader, and her mother gave her some space to do so. She stood behind her, ready to take on anything Madison dragged her into. She didn't seem to care when Madison had shoved her pistol in the volus' face. Actually, she had leaned on the table and stared the small alien down the entire time. Mordin had chosen to stay silent and instead went through his omni-tool. It was understandable, though. Just like she had seen a new side of him when they went to Tuchanka, he was seeing a new side of her.

She noticed that her mother was going through a change, as well. A very slow one. But a change. She could feel her mothers judgement radiating off of her as they made their way to the apartments. She had led people into life threatening battles all the time without hesitation, but now she was very concerned about the well-being of Madison. At first, Madison was just shrugging it off. Did she think Madison would just have a panic attack and start crying uncontrollably? Or did she think she would lose herself? That was what she had thought the entire time, but it wasn't until she had beat her target half to death that she realized what her mother was thinking.

Then the woman who had killed the council, killed her teammate, killed countless innocent lives asked her if she was sure that she was doing the right thing.

She ignored it, at first. Gave her the answers that she felt were right. She had been kind of offended by her words. The Shepard that was as ruthless as ruthless could be was questioning Madison's motives. The thought of it enraged Madison to her very core.

She _had_ to bring justice to the one that had betrayed her. Otherwise, no one else would.

Her judgement was what fueled the rage she aimed at Jayden. Her mother's face flashed in her mind as she hit him in the jaw with the handle of her pistol. She imagined her mother's face instead of his, for she wanted to do the same thing to her mother for planting the doubt in her heart. But this was not the Shepard that she had learned from or was raised by. Shepard had pulled her off him when she had straddled him on the floor, turning his face into a bloody pulp. She had held her wrist back before she had used a throw field on him. Her disapproving glare made Madison feel like she was being restrained.

But it was worse because it was Commander Shepard. Not Kaidan, not Mordin. Her own mother, and her behavior had thrown Madison off.

Her trust had began to waver. Not in herself, but in her mother. As she questioned everything Madison did, as she showed forgiveness and compassion she never knew her mother was capable of, she began to question how much her mother had changed.

On the way over to the apartments, she had began to defend Jayden, and that pissed off Madison more. She wanted to scream at her. She would've done anything in that moment to have her actual mother with her. Not this judgmental pussy.

She thought Shepard would've been standing with her, even helping her beat the crap out of the guy. She thought her mother would hug her for a job well done then they would get back to the mission.

Instead, she stood and watched as she dragged the man from her hands and cast her justice away.

"Madison, let it go!"

"No. No, fuck you! He's still alive and he'll do it _again_."

Shepard folded her arms and cocked her hip, ready to have this battle with her. "Would _you _be alive if you had killed him?"

"I'd be fine. I'd be able to move on with my life."

"Really? 'Cause I don't think so," she moved to the side, exposing Mordin, who had a sad look in his eyes, staring directly into hers. She wanted to punch him for not helping her, but something kept her frozen in place. "Do you really think you'd be able to let the guilt just fade away? Do you really think that you could escape your self torment? You don't know what it's like to carry that burden!"

"He betrayed me! He _deserves _to die!"

"You keep telling yourself that, and it'll take you down a dark path you'll never be able to escape, Madison!"

The silence in the room stretched. Madison powered up her biotic amp and started throwing anything breakable. She picked up a vase and aimed it at her mother's head. Madison felt long fingers envelope over her wrist. She turned her head and glared at Mordin. His gaze bore into her own with sorrow. Grief.

For her?

"Please. Stop."

Shepard walked towards them. "Mordin, you don't want to get in the middle of this."

Madison let every ounce of hatred line her words as she jerked her wrist out of his hand. "She's right. You don't."

And she left the apartment, the hatred and loathing for the both of them surrounding her brain with each step she took.

**Normandy SR2, Thirty Minutes Later**

Madison burst through the door of the _Normandy,_ raw anger radiating out of her pores. She turned around and faced Mordin. He stared into her eyes with grief, waiting for whatever it was she had to say or do. Shepard stood and watched beside them, Madison payed no mind to her.

Suddenly, Mordin's eyes looked to her right and he flinched his face away. She looked where he had looked and widened her eyes as she realized that she had lifted her fist up, as though she were going to punch him. Madison shivered and lowered her hand, staring at it as though it were a dead relative.

Had she really _wanted _to hit Mordin?

He was her friend. The only person in the _universe_ she could trust to have her back.

…..Or so she thought.

The thought made her heart boil with rage. At the man who said would die for her but left her defenseless against her mother. Madison locked eyes with Mordin, letting every inkling of hate fill her eyes so he could see how much she hated him in that moment.

In her peripheral vision, she saw her mother furrow her brows. Concerned for the safety of Mordin, probably.

"Can hit me. Deserve it."

"I'm going to go pack up my things," she informed, venom lining her words. "I'm sick of this fucking ship."

Madison could feel Mordin's eyes on her back as she entered the elevator.

…

Madison had stood there for seven minutes in front of her empty bag before retreating to the bathroom. It was painful and sickening to stay in her room and pack. She leaned over the bathroom sink and splashed some water in her face, letting the tears and wails of grief escape her.

She looked up into the mirror and felt even more sickened. She saw her mother. Full of despair and sadness. Hope fully drained from her body. She wondered if her mother was feeling the same way.

She heard the door open and knew exactly who it was because the air had completely changed. He had a way of doing that. She felt her heart shatter into pieces. Mordin reached over the sink and turned the water off. Madison did nothing to acknowledge that he was there. He touched her shoulder, and she felt anger rise in her again.

"Don't you dare fucking touch me."

Mordin sighed and reached around to grab her other shoulder. As he forcefully turned her to face him, she pulled back a fist and aimed for his head. He grabbed her wrist before she could graze his cheek.

"Madison."

"What did I tell you?"

Mordin chose not to react to her anger. She would make sure he regretted it. She lifted her hand to slap him, but he grabbed her other wrist, turning her to push her into the door. He realized that she truly wanted to beat him half to death. He widened his eyes as he realized how far she had descended into her rage. She kicked at his legs. He wrapped his left leg around her own to keep it from moving, and she wiggled her wrist out of his hand to pound him in the chest. He caught her wrist back, though.

"Stop it!" he yelled at her.

"Well then, let go of me, _Professor_," she tried to shove him away. "Do me a favor and go work on stupid side projects or some shit."

He glared at her. "You're acting like a child!"

"_Really_?" she almost yelled back at him. "I really don't fucking care how I'm acting! I can act how I want to fucking act!"

She jerked out of his grip. She staggered foreword as she tried to punch him, but he pinned her on the door again by twisting her arm around to her back, her face pressed to the door. They both showed contrasting feelings. Him, sadness. Her, anger. "Angry. Fight horribly when angry."

"I'm always angry, Mordin!"

He released her and backed away towards the showers. She quickly spun around and glared at him. "No, no. Only saying out of rage. Not like you. This is not you."

"Whatever! You don't know me!" She swung her fist at him again. He grabbed both her wrists, exposed her stomach, and kneed her there. While the breath was knocked out of her, he picked her up and threw her into the showers, knobs breaking and water spraying everywhere. Mordin walked toward her and stood over her.

"Don't know you? You can contemplate every outcome and consequence of a decision in a millisecond. See things that others can't. Will kill anyone and anything that gets in the way of justice or deserves it. And yet let no one else do the same in your place."

She got up off the, now wet, floor and went to charge at him, pinning him to the wall. She started to backhand him, but he blocked her easily. He reached for her shoulders and shoved her back. While she was caught off balance, he kicked at her feet and she tumbled down to the damp floor. She tried to push herself up onto her knees. Mordin was not trying to hurt her, for he didn't _want_ to hurt her. And he wasn't yet doing anything that would break any bones or make her bleed. Just catching her by surprise mostly.

Unluckily for him, she _really_ wanted to hurt him.

She pushed herself up and aimed a clumsy kick at his head. He ducked and avoid her kick. She lifted up her other leg to follow in pursuit. He reached and caught her ankle. Trying to avoid breaking her knee or dislocating her hip, he grabbed her thigh with his other hand. He turned his body and lifted her into the air. She spun a few times before landing on the soaked, hard floor.

She felt the pain in her body. _Son of a bitch knows how to fight,_ she thought to herself. She heard him take more steps behind her.

"Will tell anyone, even own mother, to fuck themselves. And will still protect them at all costs. Make hard decisions and will still sleep well enough at night. Never feel bad. Content with consequences. Willing to deal with them."

Madison rolled onto her back and lifted herself up. Trying to catch her breath, she moved cautiously towards Mordin. She could feel the anger leaving her body and her control was slowly returning to her. Mordin reached up and cupped her face in his hands.

"You are the strongest woman I've ever met. So lovely and beautiful. Inside and out. Good person, but very hard person to get along with. Why mother doesn't want you to be her. Feels guilty for the mistakes she's made. Doesn't want that for you."

She could see that he wanted her to listen to him. To hear what he was trying to tell her.

She just stared blankly up into his eyes. Giving away no emotions. He knew she was no longer angry. And this calmed him.

Mordin caressed her wet cheeks with his thumbs. "Know everything about you, Madison. Everything. The good. The bad. The orphan who lived with no mother for thirteen years. The woman who got to the rank of Lieutenant in just two years. Receiving a fatal wound and still surviving. Seen you shoot missiles at mercs and laugh. Seen you hug a justicar after she had killed her daughter. Seen you bleed, fight, and cry for those you care for. Even help those you don't care for. All of it, I have seen. Love every part of you, Madison. Madison LeeAnne Shepard would not let _this_ break her."

The silence stretched between them as they bore holes into each other's eyes. She pushed his hands away and turned away from him. She took two steps foreword. She didn't dare leave, though. She didn't want to be alone, but wanted a little space.

"Hypocrite. Want to save everyone, protect everyone, keep everyone safe. But no one can protect you. Why? Because you're the strongest one on this mission? A better fighter? I don't care about that, Madison. Want to protect you. Want to be with you. Want to share life with you. But need to meet with me. And if not, if I can't reach for you…Then it's already over. And I'm wasting my time telling you all these feelings."

She just stood staring at the door. She didn't know what she wanted to do. What she wanted to say to him. She didn't even know if she felt the same way. There had always been something there, but she had always dismissed it.

He made the decision for her.

She could hear the sound of footsteps behind her. He put his hands on her shoulders and turned her around so she was facing him. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers.

At first, she was unresponsive to his act of affection. But she soon closed her eyes and leaned into the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. She felt his hands lower from her shoulders to hug her around her waist. And hugged her tightly to him. She opened her mouth in surprise and his tongue slipped into her mouth. She could taste him. And suddenly, her jumpsuit felt too tight for her.

They had to stop.

She reluctantly and painfully pushed him away from her. They were both breathless and at a loss for words.

"I…um…" she cleared her throat. It had suddenly become very dry. "I gotta go….do some stuff…Not that I didn't enjoy…what we just, in fact we should do it more, but…I'm just-I'm just gonna stop talking now."

As she turned around, the door opened. Jack strode in, and, almost immediately, her eyes widened, examining the damage around the bathroom.

"What the fuck happened?" she said, glaring at the pair. "You know what, never mind. I'll just go piss in the boys' room. I won't tell a soul what's going on in here, don't worry."

Madison felt an intense blush hit her cheeks, and she could sense Mordin smiling behind her

* * *

**IMPORTANT INFO!**

**There have been recent occurrences on the FanFiction website where some stories have been taken down because of mature content. Some people, like myself, have worked very hard on their works, and FanFiction has no right to just completely erase someone's work. Some have even had their accounts suspended or deleted. I am worried that this might happen to me.**

**So any and all fanfcition I write will be put on this website. I welcome all of you and enjoy. You'll find the address on my profile.**

**NOTE: I will still continue the story on FanFiction.**


	7. Everything

Chapter 7

_"You're all I want. You're all I need." - Lifehouse_

**The Collector Base, The Long Walk**

All she could hear was gunfire and yelling all around her. It had been really difficult for them to fight through the Collectors and slowly inch their way towards the door. But now they were pinned. They were forced to wait.

She stared at the closed panels behind them. Or, if you want to get specific, the two large panels of safety that we're constantly taunting her, promising her that the pain would be over soon. She would kill herself if she so much as crawled to the door, but she wanted to be free of the constant pain as soon as possible.

From what she last heard of the communication from Miranda, they we're probably already at the doors waiting for them.

Madison heard a feminine cry ring out through the air. She turned to see Tali flying face(or mask?) first into the ground. It looked like Harbinger had shot her with one of his biotic blasts into her back. Her barrier had died out completely, leaving her on the ground vulnerable.

"Tali!" her mother shouted. She ran from her cover toward the unconscious quarian.

"Covering Shepard-Commander," Legion said.

"Mom, you dumb ass…" Madison said through her grit teeth. She saw as bullets flashed by her towards her mother. She had abandoned her weapon at her cover so that she could run fast enough to get Tali. She picked up Tali and threw her over her shoulder, sprinting back into cover.

"God dam it, Tali!" Once they had been behind cover again, her mother turned Tali onto her back. She checked all over her suit for ruptures. There appeared to be nothing. Tali stirred bringing her hand up to the front of her mask. "Tali, are you alright?"

"Shepard?" She reached out and grabbed Shepard's shoulder. "Did…Did I die?"

"No, thank God…Harbinger hit you with one of his biotic blast thingies or something close to that, at least."

"Were there any ruptures in my suit?"

"None. You'll be fine."

She hissed in pain as she tried to get up and head towards the doors, but her mother picked her up by the waist as they made their way over.

"I don't think so," Shepard projected, taking out her pistol and aiming behind her. "You need to rest a little. At least, until we get to the door. We'll need you to open them."

"I feel fine, Shepard."

"Tali, I'm your commanding officer. _That _was an order."

Tali nodded and remained limp in Shepard's arm. Madison glanced around herself as they walked towards the doors. Legion stood and sent out his combat drone to distract them a little. Her mother killed a Collector, but another one killed her shields. A round grazed her cheek and left a long red line.

Legion caught up to them and fired with his sniper rifle, the bullets from the enemy were being deflected by his shield. However, he began to experience some glitches due to the damage he was taking, some oil started to flow from his tubes, but he continued to attack.

They needed to continue on to open the door, there wasn't any time to wait for their barriers to reactivate. Even with the team firing at the Collectors, they somehow continued to follow them. They were intelligent enough to get to cover before getting killed, but a lot of wounds would add up to the same thing.

They were dying quickly.

_+Shepard!+_

Miranda had called over the radio.

_+We've been at the door for a few minutes! We need you to get those doors open!+_

Shepard groaned and pressed her hand to the side of her helmet.

_+Calm down! We're on our way! You're not the only one taking fire, you know! Now, what's the situation over there?+_

_+We're pinned down. we can't stay here,Shepard! We're taking heavy damage! Jack got shot in her good shoulder, so she won't be able to fight very well. Grunt is doing well, but his energy is draining.+_

Madison sighed in relief as they reached the doors. Not only did she want the pain to leave her, but she wanted Miranda to just shut up. Her mother set Tali down and turned around to cover her.

"Tali, You get the door open! Madison, stay behind Legion and I. Legion, stand right next to me! We'll be Madison's shield."

She slapped her hand into the side of her face.

_+Miranda, you better be ready as soon as those doors open.+_

Tali sat down in front of the console, having her omni-tool at the ready. Madison walked towards the doors to stand next to Tali, the quarian managed to work really fast under pressure. The Collectors fired at them, bullets hitting their shields. Madison watched on her omni-tool as Tali's shield indicator lowered and disappeared.

"Tali, you need to hurry…" Madison muttered.

_+There's no cover at the doors, and I don't see them opening!+_

Madison heard Jack yell over the comm link. Tali curled up closer to the console as more bullets rushed passed her. Her fingers glided over the different buttons on her omni-tool. From what Madison could tell by her body language, she was still very afraid.

"Tali…" Madison turned her back on the door and pressed against it. She looked around herself in a daze, about ready to just collapse. "Legion…" The geth was moving slowly backwards, continuing to fire with his assault rifle in one hand and covering some of his tubes with the other hand, trying to keep anymore oil from leaving his body. "Mom…" The woman fired from her shotgun, grunting with each bullet that broke through her shield. Harbinger threw another biotic blast, knocking Shepard completely off her feet. "Damn it…"

Legion turned and hurled Shepard back up from her arm. She jerked her arm out of his grasp and continued to fire.

"Get that damn door open, Tali!" She put her shotgun up, pulling out her assault rifle and pistol. She lifted both her arms and fired at the various Collectors, not worrying about aiming but still trying to cover Madison and Tali. A bullet collided with her shoulder sending her backwards a few steps, but she rolled her shoulder and went back to her spot next to Legion. Another one of Harbinger's biotic blasts sent her falling again. She grunted as she forced herself back up to her feet.

_+God damn it, Shepard!+_

There was a rush behind Madison, and she fell backwards, the biotic bubble dissipating. The sudden disappearance of the bubble left Madison with her brain throbbing and bile rising in her throat. She quickly turned over onto her hands and knees, and the puke emptied itself through her mouth. Somewhere between that time, the doors behind her closed and the other doors opened.

"Mordin!"

She looked up just as he had reached her. He pulled her up from her arm and she stumbled forward, reaching for her pistol. She felt the nausea rushing down to her stomach, and her vision blurred as everything became washed out. She fell backwards into Mordin, and he caught her, lowering themselves to the ground.

In front of them, she saw as the rest of the fire team yelled at each other to get going and ran through the doors, firing behind themselves. Shepard and Miranda stood next to each other at the front of the group, both of them continuing to fire as they backed up slowly through the doors.

There was a dark flash in Madison's vision. As she turned to investigate, she saw her mother fall backwards as the dark ball collided with her mother's chest. Madison shoved her way out of Mordin's grasp and ran to her mother's side to help her. She grabbed her mother's arm and pulled her up. Just as she had done so, she saw a bullet collide with Shepard's knee, sending her back to the ground. Another bullet hit Madison's shoulder, sending her spinning to the side and falling towards her mother. Shepard wrapped an arm around Madison's waist and hoisted her up onto her own shoulder. Madison drew her pistol and fired from behind her mom.

As soon as they went through the doors, Shepard turned to add her fire with everyone else's. She leaned foreword and set Madison down. She turned around, ready to take on anything.

But something slammed into her chest, sending her at least twenty feet backwards, her feet lifting up off the ground, and her head leaning back. Shepard turned, and Madison heard her terrified voice in her ears.

"MADISON!"

_I guess I was wrong, _she thought as she skidded against the ground. _There are many things I regret._

**Normandy SR-2, Twelve Days Previously**

"I don't think I'll ever be able to get over how white this ship is. It's so bright all the time."

Shepard smiled up at her daughter as she sat down next to her. Madison set down a cup of tea, holding her own in her other hand. Madison took a sip of her tea. The liquid had begun to taste better now, after a few more practiced tries. She was also experimenting and getting better at cooking. She noticed that Mordin would sometimes creep down to her quarters just so that she could cook for him. It was early morning on the starship, the ship completely drained of life. Everyone was asleep except for Madison and Shepard. It was understandable, though. Everyone's tensions were starting to get very high.

Madison was somewhat happy when her mother called for her just so that she could make her some of her tea. Somewhat.

"Are you not sleeping, Mom?"

Shepard closed her eyes and rubbed her face. "It's starting to get very hard. But I could ask you the same thing."

"I think it's just nerves getting to us," Madison muttered, bringing her knees up so she could rest her head on them. She was wearing some sweat pants and a tank top. Shepard had noticed that bags were beginning to form under Madison's eyes, her flawless complexion becoming paler, making it obvious that she was in distress. Shepard was beginning to worry. However, no matter how puffy her eyes got or how sickly her skin looked, Madison LeeAnne Shepard was still very beautiful. Because she was her daughter.

She loved Madison.

"Are you alright? Are you having nightmares or anything?….Is Mordin keeping you up?" she found herself getting worked up, letting the questions roll off her tongue.

Madison's cheeks got bright red before she answered back. "What? Um…Sometimes…I mean the nightmare part. Mordin and I haven't actually…Well….You know."

Shepard didn't know how to feel about that. She was relieved that her daughter wasn't having sex, but, at the same time, she thought that might be the best thing for her right now so she could loosen up and not have to worry. The silence between them continued to grow. Shepard and Madison still weren't on good terms. Anything Shepard could say would tip the balance of their conversation. She didn't want that.

"Is Tali alright?" Madison asked, looking down at her cup on the table.

"I think she is," Shepard picked up her glass and took a swig. "I actually had to act as a commander and _order_ her to go to sleep. She's napping in the crew's quarters right now," Madison remained silent.

"Don't you think you should've submitted the evidence of her innocence?" she finally asked.

"I don't think that would've been the best thing," Shepard answered truthfully. "She would've been very upset with me. The important thing is that she knows she's innocent, and so do I."

"But, Mom, what if you had gotten her exiled? Haven't you ever listened to her? The Flotilla is her home, and she's so proud of it."

"I wouldn't let that happen to her. But even if I did get her exiled, she would always be welcomed here on the _Normandy_. Tali cares about her family very much. And everyone on this crew now serves as her family."

"No offense, Mom, but this is a suicide mission. If this is your idea of a happy family, then we're a pretty fucked up family," She looked at her parent, raising an eyebrow. Then her face got consumed with sadness. "I keep thinking about that message, where that quarian mother was saying that she loved her child. And then there was Tali's dad who just gave her orders in his last few moments of life. Why couldn't he work an 'I love you' in his message? I mean Tali risked exile just so his name wouldn't be tainted."

"I can assure you, he loved her very much," Shepard told her. Madison heard the slight pitch change in her voice. Her mother's past wasn't ever a secret, but even Madison found herself looking it up more often than actually asking her mother about it. She had become apart of a street gang, before they became anti-alien. When she had turned eighteen, she left that life for a life in the military. Madison was all too familiar with family issues. But Madison wondered if Shepard had a different view point on family. After thinking about that, Madison began to realize that Shepard had no knowledge of family at all. She didn't have any parents. She didn't have any siblings. There was only Madison.

Madison began to wonder if she had actually ever had somebody raise her. If she had ever had someone truly love her.

"Did you want to call Sam and Julia? I don't think we have too much time on our hands anymore."

"I don't know," Madison answered. "What would I tell them? 'Hello, my wonderful adoptive parents. Guess what? My mom picked me up about eight months ago so we could travel through the Omega Four Relay soon, which leads to the center of the milky way. I would consider saying see you soon, but I might die on this mission. So, I love you guys. Bye,'"

"You _will _survive, Madison," Shepard said, snapping her gaze to Madison's.

There was a small silence between them until Madison let the words she had been wanting to say for a while out.

"You never really talk about my dad, Mom."

Shepard frowned slightly before taking another drink of her tea. If Madison wanted to talk about him, then they would talk about him. Madison was only trying to make things alright between them again. And Shepard hoped that it would help mend their relationship. "Well, he's your father. There's nothing more to know about him."

Madison pulled her knees closer to her chest. "…I still want to know…"

"I know. I just try not to think about him too much."

"What was he like before he…?"

Shepard stared into her cup, avoiding all eye contact. "Honestly, I don't know why I didn't see it coming. He wasn't too hung up on tradition or religion or anything like that. Nothing held him back. He was a mercenary. Would rather kill thousands of men before ever settling down and having children."

"That's not very surprising," Madison whispered, pressing her face into her knees.

"He was the one that taught me how to defend myself," she said. "With a gun and hand-to-hand. He was the best gunner I'd ever seen. You got that from him. However, I was better at hand-to-hand combat. You got that from me."

"So who looks more like me? You or dad?" Madison asked.

Shepard grinned. "You have very little of his physical traits. The only thing I can really see is that you have his skin tone and his thin body, but that's it."

"Tell me more about him."

"He was very careless," Shepard answered. "Very rude and racist. He never cared if he killed thousands of innocents to get to his goal. His needs would always come before anyone else's."

"He sounds like an asshole," Madison immediately said. "He was a mercenary? Who did he work for?"

Shepard laughed as she drank the rest of her tea. "He was a freelancer. I wouldn't be surprised if he was dead." She saw the slightly sad expression on Madison's face but decided to ignore it for the time being. "He would't have died without a fight, though. All hell would've broken loose. He wouldn't flee or surrender even if his life depended on it. He was a very dangerous man."

"He's like me," Madison whispered.

"No, he's not. You two may share the same DNA, but you are both very different people. He would kill in cold blood. If you disagreed with him, you were dead. If you were not human, you were dead. He would plan hate crimes against any race. He is a _horrible_ person."

"Thanks, but I am a pretty horrible person myself," Madison pointed out. "I'm exactly like him minus the racism."

"No. You are a better person than he will ever be," Shepard tried to reassure her.

"But, Mom, I always had a mind set that I would kill anyone that got in the way of my plans. You saw me beat an ex-lover of mine to an inch of his life. I never cared."

"You are a good person, Madison," Shepard's voice raised, but she didn't bother to lower it. "You've only killed bad people to protect innocents. He would kill anyone, innocent or not."

"You said that you didn't know if he was dead or not. Do you know where he was last seen?"

Shepard began wondering why she was asking about her father. Did she want to meet him? What did Madison want? "Last I heard he was on a human colony, Arvuna. It's located somewhere in the Calestone Rift. That was years ago, though, I doubt he's still there."

Madison raised a brow. "Do you have any idea what he was doing there?"

"He was probably looking for more victims. He was a pedophile, after all. He has a very powerful hunger for children. Or he might've even been fulfilling a job. Who knows?"

"Oh my God," Madison breathed out, she shook her head and changed the subject. "Me and Mordin are talking about moving in with each other after this mission's over."

"I'm very happy for the both of you. You should make the most of your relationship before the mission," Shepard smiled at her daughter.

Madison's eyes saddened again and continued to stare at her tea. Shepard realized what her statement meant, and she could feel something settle at the pit of her stomach. Shepard just closed her eyes and continued to talk. "You're positive that you don't want to call Sam and Julia? I think that it would make them very happy if you contacted them. You don't even have to tell them any specifics, just talk to them-"

"About Legion. Is he gonna be problem?"

"What do you mean?" Shepard asked. She didn't even know if Madison had come into contact with him, and it worried her.

"Well, I came out of my room the other day, and I saw him studying everyone. He was watching me. And it just-"

"Don't talk to him, Madison."

"What? Why?"

"You heard what I said," Shepard leaned foreword, and Madison felt herself shrink under her gaze. "Don't talk to him. Don't look at him. Don't even acknowledge his existence. Okay?"

Madison already knew that her mother just wanted to protect her; but she never suspected that she would be afraid of Legion. Or perhaps she was afraid of Legion attacking, even killing, Madison. If it were somebody like Mordin telling her to stay away from him, she would've flat out refused and told him that she would make her own decisions. But it was her mother telling her. And her mother knew a dangerous person when she met one.

"Okay."

"Okay," Shepard repeated. "And, regarding Sam and Julia, I'm just telling you that, if you need to, you can call them."

"I've been talking to them every once in a while," Madison commented. She was trying to switch the conversation around to something her mother would be more comfortable discussing. Madison saw Shepard's expression turn to one of surprise. Madison was surprised that Mordin or anyone from Cerberus hadn't told her. She was using the lab's console to contact them, after all.

"And what's up with them?"

Madison shrugged. "Julia's pregnant with a little baby girl. Sam went to the Citadel to talk with different doctors, and, eventually, Julia's going to move up there with him. Julia…Her baby might die when it's born. And there are very few treatments for the baby's disease. They can't even afford any of it. They're trying to negotiate with different doctors on the Citadel."

"The baby might die?" Shepard widened her eyes. She reached out to Madison and held her hands in hers. "Madison, you can go if you want to."

"I won't do that," Madison answered. "I do accept the baby as one of my siblings. Even Sam and Julia want me in it's life if it survives. But I wouldn't be able to do anything. And I have a duty here to fulfill."

"If you don't mind me prying, what does the baby have?"

"It's called anencephaly," Madison felt the tears well up in her eyes at the thought. "It's a rare cephalic disorder. It usually results from a neural tube defect where the head fails to close. The baby doesn't have a huge chunk of it's brain, skull, or scalp. It never grew correctly. Usually when the baby's born, it'll be blind, deaf, unconscious, unable to feel any pain what so ever. Sometimes, babies with anencephaly will have a main brain stem, but they may never gain consciousness or reflexes like breathing, sound, or touch. If the baby doesn't die in stillbirth, then it'll die in a few hours or days after birth from cardiorespiratory arrest."

Madison kept her eyes on her tea, not daring to look anywhere else.

"When was the baby diagnosed?"

She felt the tears roll down her cheeks. "On Julia's twenty-fifth day of pregnancy. About a month ago.

Shepard tightened her hold around Madison's hand, and she was thankful for it. Madison had been trying really hard to grasp the fact that her baby sister might die either in stillbirth or a few days after birth. If it happened, Madison had no idea how she would handle it. "Can Julia still be treated?"

"Yeah," Madison whimpered, wiping her cheeks. "She has at least eight more months left before the due date. But all the best doctors are way too expensive and-"

"Take all the money you need from my Cerberus accounts and send them to Sam or Julia," Shepard told her, her voice absolute. "You should talk to Mordin as well, sweetie. I'm sure he'll want to help you and your family. He could probably contact some of his STG colleagues."

"I…I never thought-"

"I also passed some information along to the Shadow Broker during my investigation against Saren. He owes me. He'll probably have a lot of information about this disease. I could probably contact Doctor Michel on the Citadel, as well. Tell her to talk to Sam and see if she can help them."

"Mom, please, slow down," she turned towards her mother and held on to her hands. "Thank you so much," More tears began to flow out of her eyes. "For everything. This means so much to me. Thank you. Thank you so much," Madison had no idea that her mother would've been willing to help. It was overwhelming.

"Everything will be fine, Madison," she whispered, moving some hair out of her daughters eyes. "If I can save the whole galaxy from the threat of the Reapers, I sure as hell will save your sister."

Madison couldn't believe it. "We still have a little time, Mom."

"No, we don't," Shepard said truthfully. "The IFF may still be installing onto the ship, but as soon as it comes online, we're heading for the Omega Four Relay."

"I'm pretty sure we're gonna make it through the Relay just fine," Madison commented, her voice full of determination. "Mom, don't worry about it right now. Julia's still eight months away from her due date, and I think she'll still be pregnant when we get back from the Relay. But you really need some sleep, Mom."

Shepard laughed. "You need rest to, Madison. I don't want you passing out from exhaustion inside the Collector's Base."

Madison smiled with her mother. "Oh, I can't wait to go up against an enemy that's helping the Reapers annihilate all organic life," Madison said. "It'll be so much fun."

Shepard squeezed her hand. "Thank you, Madison. Most people would probably be terrified to go into a suicide mission with me. But you just look at it as a training ground," She withdrew her hands from her mother's and finally decided to take a drink some of her tea. "I feel like a bad person, though. How can I just ask all these people with lives and families and friends to come with me to the galactic core where they could all die?"

"It's not like you forced them to join forces with you. They could leave whenever they want to. Even _I_ could leave, if I wanted to," she took another sip of her tea. "They want to do this and I'm not leaving until the Collectors get the death they definitely deserve. I don't care if it's a Reaper, the galactic core, dark space, even a black hole, I'm not going to give up. I want the universe to continue on without the Reapers interfering."

"I know that you want to but…" she started. "But that scares me, Madison," Shepard leaned toward the table, intertwining her fingers together. Madison waited for her mother to continue. "Your life…it's so important to me, Madison."

"Why?"

"Everyday a new challenge is introduced to me. Reapers. Collectors. The galactic core. But every time something gets overwhelming, I think of the only reason I'm fighting," Shepard turned her head and stared lovingly into Madison's eyes. Madison let out a breath. "I'm sorry. I know that I've been very distant lately. I was trying to give you some space to breathe."

"It's completely fine, Mom. We're kind of on the run right now. Most of us don't have time to talk to each other or anything like that."

Shepard sighed and turned her face away from hers, becoming transfixed by the table. "I _have_ been distant, Madison, whether you believe me or not. And I truly am sorry. You see…I had to get some things straight…"

"What do you mean? What did you need to sort out?"

"My mind."

"What? Mom, What are you talking about? You're not making any sense," Madison shifted until her ankles were under her bottom, turning towards her mother to fully face her. Her sleep-deprived brain wracked at all the possible options. She hadn't really thought about why her mother was avoiding her.

Her mother let out a breath before choking out, "Ashley…"

Madison furrowed her brows in confusion. She had never met Ashley before, but she knew that Ashley had given up her life during the battle on Virmire. She didn't know why her mother was letting it bother her now or why she was bringing it up. Her curiosity begged for more information.

"It bothers me greatly to discuss this with you, but I feel in my heart that you need to know," Shepard turned towards Madison, staring deeply into her eyes. She desperately wanted Madison to know what was on her mind. "I loved Kaidan very much, Madison. I want you to know that. I cared about him deeply, and I never wanted to let him go. Me and him…we were a disaster waiting to happen. I wasn't what he thought I was, I wore a mask over my true self around him. And he was…I…" Madison could tell she was struggling, trying to tell her what was on her mind. "He wasn't what I needed. But he was everything I had ever wanted. But I think that was mostly because…he was just there. He was there when nobody else was," she turned her gaze back to the table. "When it came down to it, sacrificing Ashley on Virmire wasn't as hard as everyone thought it was. I chose Ashley because I did not want to lose Kaidan. I chose her because I felt in my heart that I wouldn't be able to go on without Kaidan in my life."

Her eyes focused back onto Madison. "But…I realized that I would've still had you, Madison. And if something happened to you, it wouldn't matter if Kaidan was in my life or not, I wouldn't be able to live with myself anymore. I wouldn't care what happened. If trillions died. If the Reapers came and destroyed the universe. I would never…I would never be able to live in a universe without you. I love you, Madison," Shepard's eyes became glassy as the tears started to fill them. "I don't care if Kaidan dies or Garrus or any of my crew dies. As long as you live on, I will always be happy. I know that that's scary for you to know. But it's true. Back when I was on Earth, I loved no one, and nobody loved me. I took care of myself. When I joined the Alliance, I came to realize that you were my reason. My everything. I got myself promoted because I wanted to make you proud. I got myself recognized by the Alliance Brass because I wanted to make you proud. I fought through everything on Akuze because I wanted to make you proud. I became a Spectre because I wanted to make you proud. I_ want _to be in your life, Madison. I want to see you get married. I want to see you have my grandchildren. I want to guide you through any obstacle you find in your path. I want to go through everything with you. I don't know you as much as I'd like to. I still have a lot of learning to do. But I don't care if you start working with the Collectors or get indoctrinated by a Reaper. I will _always_ love you. And I will _never _forsake you."

Madison just stared at her mother, her own tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"It's probably a bad time to start telling you these things. But, like I've been saying all this time, we're on a suicide mission. Of all places, we're being lead straight into the galactic core. This is way more life-threatening then my investigation into Saren. And I don't want to die, Madison. I want to live for you. We _will _defeat Harbinger, and every god damn Reaper to come into existence," She rested her face in her hands. "I want a future. But I don't want a future full of fighting or being a spectre or anything like that. I want a future where you are there."

Madison just sat and stared as her mother as she broke down in front of her. Every thought that she had ever had of her mother slowly erased itself from Madison's mind as she came to realize just how much her mother actually loved her. It was like Madison could now hear every word her mother was ever trying to say to her.

"I thought you didn't have any weaknesses," she felt her voice whimper as she said it.

"You're my only weakness."

Madison felt the words implant themselves in her mind, finally believing her mother and finally accepting her love. Shepard reached out and grabbed her hands.

"There were so many reasons why I changed after my death," she told her. "I wanted to actually teach you right from wrong. I wanted you to look up to me. I wanted you to follow me. Trust me. I wanted to finally take responsibility for you. I was awakened by God's blessing, giving me a second chance to make things right with you. Before I…I was leading you down the wrong path. If I had known what I did would affect you, God, I would've done everything differently."

"You had no way of knowing," Madison said. "You showed me that the universe is a bad place, Mom. Yes, there is some good in it, but you saved me from living a life of ignorance. I would've learned the hard way what the universe was like."

"But I could've done things differently to show you that," Shepard said.

"But you taught me how to deal with the consequences of my actions," Madison added, smiling.

She took a breath, now it was her turn to do some confessing. "When we met, Mom, I had so much admiration for you. You were my idol. And as time continued, you taught me so much more than you realize. No, I never did see myself as your daughter at the time. I only saw that I could learn things from you, and you were the only one that could show me. You showed me the universe. Fighting beside you now, feels right to me. I belong next to you in the battles ahead. For the rest of my life. We _are _going to survive the Omega Four Relay. We _are _going to make it back through, unharmed. We _are _going to completely obliterate the Reapers. And I just want to be beside you through all of it. I've always been really proud of you, Mom. But let's not focus on the past or the future. Let's just focus on right now. And just be with each other right now."

Shepard smiled. "I guess we can do that."

"But right now," Madison stood and pointed at her mother like she was about to scold her. "You need to go to bed. It'll be very hard to do these next few missions if you're dog tired."

"Couldn't you just do them without me?" Shepard teased.

"Nope. Never," Madison said. "Now, go to bed."

Shepard got up and walked towards her bed. Madison began to exit but then stopped in her tracks. She was surprised with what she was about to ask her mother.

"Mom, can I sleep in here?"

Shepard smiled at her and nodded.

As Madison laid down on the bed with her mother, the thought of losing her mother crossed her mind.

She realized what true fear was.


	8. Digame

Chapter 8

_"Maybe heaven's where you are." - Anna Nalick_

**The Collector Base, The Final Battle**

"Madison!"

Mordin quickly ran to her side, omni-tool at the ready. She was laying on the ground with her eyes opened, completely stationary. Her mother had joined him and was now running her hands all over her suit, checking for tears and holes. To his relief, Madison lifted her hand up to her chest where the impact had hit her.

_By the gods… _She wasn't dead.

"Holy shit, Madison…" Shepard lifted both her hands to her own face, trying to relax. "Please, don't do that to me…" she whispered to herself.

Not caring who saw, he took one of Madison's hands in his and rested his forehead against hers. He lifted his other hand to caress her cheek. There were no words in existence that could describe the relief he was feeling that she wasn't dead but also terror that she could've died. Now that they were out of combat and he knew she wasn't dead, the adrenaline that had been flowing through his veins slowly disappeared, leaving him a little weak and shaking. However, almost immediately, he began feeling light-headed as his smaller wounds and bruises began begging for his attention. His muscles started becoming sore, and the pain was so great that he didn't think he would be able to, so much as, pass out.

He lifted his face from hers and helped her so that she was leaning against the structure that, thankfully, she didn't run into. She winced as the expected pain ran through her body. Her green eyes looked almost lifeless, like a shell. Mordin felt an unfamiliar instinct wash over him, and he wanted to take her in his arms so that she could rest and he could watch over her. He rested his hand on top of his pistol, ready to challenge anything that would take advantage of her weakened and vulnerable state.

"Any casualties?" he heard Shepard ask Miranda. Mordin lifted his hand and rested it on Madison's shoulder.

"There were none," Miranda answered.

"We're fucking lucky as hell," Jack added in. "If you hadn't opened the doors when you did, we would've all been dead."

"There is still time for that," Garrus commented.

"Well, aren't you just a beacon of optimism?"

Shepard smiled and pat Miranda on the shoulder. "You did good."

Mordin moved some hair out of Madison's eyes then turned to examine the situation. Tali was kneeling in front of Legion, trying to fix his leaking tubes. He was surprised, but this was a life or death mission, and they were probably temporarily putting aside their rivalry. Jacob was over by Grunt, helping him with his horrendous face wounds. The young krogan accepted the help, showing how much pain he was actually in. Jack was laying on the ground with her eyes closed and her hands folded over her stomach as some medi-gel was healing her shoulder. Miranda was sitting off to the side, hugging her knees to her chest. Shepard and Garrus were standing next to each other with their assault rifles out, ready to take on any Collectors that might swoop in on them. Actually, everyone had at least some sort of weapon in their hands. Resting in an enemies territory was always a very dangerous thing to do. Mordin had learned that once or twice the hard way.

Shepard walked over towards Madison and Mordin, holding a medi-gel pack. She offered it to Madison.

He watched as Madison shoved it away. "No, no. I don't want it."

"Madison…" Shepard began but she didn't continue to protest. Madison was just trying to show that she was strong. Trying to act like what had just happened was nothing. She wouldn't take it willingly.

Shepard nodded at him and tossed the pack to Mordin. Mordin connected the pack into her suit, despite Madison's glare. He heaved himself up from the ground, his pained muscles screaming at him. He smiled at her as she let out a sigh, the medi-gel was probably spreading some relief through her body. He held out his hand to her and she took it, letting him lift her to her feet. Either he had pulled too hard or she had overbalanced, she stumbled foreword into his arms before straightening herself up.

"Worried. Don't know how long we can keep this up," he said.

She grabbed his hand, caressing the back of it with her thumb. "W're almost there. Look at the tubes."

He followed her gaze up to the ceiling where the thick tubes were. He followed them to see that the destination was through a long tunnel, ending at a distant chamber.

"Hmm. Final battle. Expecting long, hard fight."

She lifted her hand to rest on his shoulder, never lifting her gaze from their next destination. He placed his hand on the small of her back. A hug, not a full hug, but a hug, none the less. She pulled away and went to stand with her mother, leaving him feeling somewhat cold.

_+Shepard to _Normandy.+

Shepard said, pressing her hand into the side of her helmet.

_+Give me a status report.+_

_+Thane and Samara have arrived with the other crew members. There were no casualties.+_

He saw Madison relax, relieved that they had made it just fine. Then she straightened up once more. She was in 'Soldier' mode now. She was strong. No weaknesses.

"Listen up, Everyone!" Shepard projected. "We're here. No turning back now," She lifted herself on to a platform ungracefully. She turned and looked out into the group. "No doubt, the Collectors are trying to get through that door right now."

To confirm their fears and assumptions, Joker radioed in almost in an instant.

_+Looks like you're psychic, Shepard. There's a mass at the door. A huge swarm of them. It probably won't be long until they burst through.+_

Shepard glanced at the door, then brought her focus back to the group. The crew waited for her to say something.

"Shepard, pick a group to go with you. The rest of us will stay here and hold the line." Miranda suggested.

Mordin watched as the gears began turning inside of her head.

"Okay," she decided. "Madison."

He could tell that Madison was trying to appear as though nothing was wrong with her as she lifted herself up onto the platform next to her mother. Though she had been taking little to no fire since the mission started, that blow to her chest looked very painful. She was also exhausted from holding the biotic bubble up for so long. However, Madison knew her limits. She would've rejected if she knew she couldn't do it.

He could see why Shepard would take her. She was exceptionally well at keeping the heat off Shepard as Shepard focused on the real threat. She was very, quick, agile, and flexible, able to dodge bullets, take out her heavy pistol, then switch to her submachine gun without difficulty. She could fight at long distance with her guns or close range with just her fists. She could use her biotics or her tech anytime she chose to. Shepard needed someone with low defense. She would be in more danger holding the line.

Shepard scanned the others, sizing them up, thinking of who would be a good combination with Madison. Most of the time when Shepard picked Madison, he would be with her as well, watching over her. However, Shepard probably wanted someone that could protect her daughter should anything happen. Mordin would still be protecting her, just not in the way that he would've hoped.

Garrus seemed to be a good choice. He was strong, and he would be able to back her up should she need him to do so. And if something happened to Shepard, he would be able to step up as the leader and take care of Madison. Even better, Shepard trusted him more than anyone else on the crew, besides Madison and Tali.

Legion might be a good replacement. His rifle was really effective, and his robotic body made him less susceptible to exhaustion like everyone else. However, Shepard didn't trust him, especially since, at any moment, he could turn on them. So he was already a 'no'. Grunt would've been somewhat useful taking on anything in close combat, but he would be more useful holding the line and acting as a punching bag for the Collectors. Shepard might pick Tali to go with her, since she also trusted her, but Tali couldn't really do much damage. She wouldn't be able to take care of her daughter if something happened. Shepard might take her anyway because of her low defense, but it really didn't matter all too much. Any one of them could die at any given moment.

It was already decided that Shepard would not take Miranda. She never chose Miranda for anything. But Shepard didn't trust Miranda, and she didn't want someone she didn't trust protecting her daughter. That went for Jacob, as well. Samara would've been a good choice had she not have gone back to the _Normandy_ with Thane. Her biotics would've been useful. Madison trusted her, and that was enough for Shepard. Jack wouldn't go. Jack's abilities would be better for holding the line. Besides, Madison was already very afraid of her.

Garrus. She would choose Garrus.

He was the only one with no flaws.

Mordin felt a slight charge of anger race through his body. He didn't care if Garrus was the only one to be qualified. He wanted to protect Madison. He wanted to shield her, fight with her, die with her if it was necessary. He had been alone all his life, completely empty. And he didn't even realize that he had been feeling that way until she had waltzed right into his life eight months ago, coming completely out of no where.

It wasn't fair. He wouldn't be able to let her go knowing that he may never see her again.

**Abandoned Cerberus Facility, Twenty Hours Previously**

Mordin reached out as Madison tossed him an extra thermal clip. He slammed it into his pistol with just enough time to draw back and shoot at the lifeless husks sprinting towards them. He glanced over his shoulder to see Madison pulling out her heavy pistol, shooting every husk that came at her between the eyes. Her submachine gun laid on the ground buried under extra thermal clips, patiently waiting for a time when Madison would need to sacrifice power for speed. Every once in a while, she and Mordin would switch places, using his submachine gun to help her shoot the husks, using incinerate and cryo blast when needed. Though they were very powerful abilities, Mordin needed to limit his power usage so that he could have enough strength to fight. Same with Madison.

_+Tali, what the fuck is wrong with the security controls?+_

Madison practically yelled at the young quarian. Though Mordin did not agree with her methods, it might've been necessary in order to make Tali work faster. However, the added pressure would probably send the quarian into a state of stress.

_+Well, Garrus, Thane, and your mother are saved…+_

Tali's voice was trembling with fear.

_+They're taking the elevator back to the control room now. I'm trying really hard to bypass the locks on the elevator behind you, but it'll take more time 'cause they're stronger than the other locks.+_

_+Fuck me-What about Legion? How is he contributing to all this?+_

_+Legion is connected to the main terminal, trying to disable the AI from the security systems. But he hasn't been successful, so far. Just give me some time! I'm trying my hardest!+_

_+Oh okay. Mordin and I will just wait down here and get eaten by the killer zombies.+_

Mordin panicked as a husk slipped past him and focused on Madison. He had been trained to never turn your back on the enemy, and he knew that Madison was perfectly capable of handling it, but he couldn't shake the protective instinct that had washed over him away. He heard a gun fire behind him and knew that the husk had been dealt with.

_+We're completely fine down here, Tali. Really. We just have a FUCKING HORDE OF THESE BASTARDS TRYING TO KILL US!+_

The AI that ran the facility had been a prototype of EDI, and the facility had been testing on her. It had judged the Cerberus staff as "hazards", so they unshackled the AI in hopes that it wouldn't kill them. However, the facility had been testing on husks, wondering if somehow they could be warped back into their original human form. And after unshackling the AI, the containment cells had opened, letting the husks, that were now trying to kill them, kill the staff.

"Toss me a clip!" Mordin yelled, as the heated clip was ejected from his submachine gun. The clip had lodged itself into a husks chest wound, burning the husks skin. Mordin caught the next thermal clip and shoved it in his gun, then proceeded to shoot the husk in the throat.

But they just kept coming.

They only had a few more clips left. And Mordin could still see them desperately trying to climb up the debris towards them.

"I knew we could't trust the Illusive Man!" Madison shouted. "He must really want to get us killed. Because he didn't say a damn thing about this giant death pit of husks!" Madison shot some more husks before ejecting her clip to get a new one. "Mordin if we die in here, I swear to God, that I am going to haunt that motherfucker until the day he dies! Even after that! I'll turn his life into a living hell!"

"Madison! Less talking! More shooting!" he yelled back, hitting a husk on the crown of his head with the handle of his gun. He proceeded to place his foot on it's neck, and with the right amount of pressure and pivoting perfectly, he snapped it. He then backhanded another and sent it flying down the debris.

The facility had been long abandoned and was used for testing on the Lazarus Project. When her mother had asked the Illusive Man about what they were testing, he simply answered that they were trying to test the effectiveness of the Lazarus project, whatever that meant. However, there was still some data that needed to be recovered, so, of course, he sent Shepard since she was apparently the only one capable for the job.

When they landed on the planet, they found exactly what they were expecting to find. A completely deserted building. The building itself was a giant sphere, with one half above surface and the other half below surface. There were only two main paths in the facility. One lead upward in a spiral motion to various offices. The other was a similar path, only leading downwards and to labs. Then there was an elevator that led all the way up and all the way down. And all these paths connected to the control room, the main room of the facility. Tali was at the main computer in the control room with Grunt and Samara watching over and protecting her. That left Shepard and her team, Garrus and Thane, to go up, while Madison an Mordin went down.

That definitely wasn't a very good idea.

What they were stationed on was a giant hill of metal debris that had been a walkway leading to different holding cells above a seemingly bottomless pit. When the security AI had become aware of unauthorized personnel in the building, it proceeded to lock every door and blew up the beams holding up the walkway, sending the pair rolling down into the pit.

When they had finally gained back their composure, they were unable to see anything or contact anyone in the facility.

It had taken about five minutes for the comm link to come back online; Long after they had figured out about the husks.

Fighting in the dark was a very terrifying experience. But it wasn't even comparable to the feeling they got when they actually found out just how many they were facing after Tali and Legion had managed to turn the lights back on in the facility.

_+Shepard-Lieutenant, the AI is no longer hostile.+_

_+Oh, that's good. Now we just need to deal with these fucking husks.+_

Mordin shook his head and killed another husk.

Somehow, the hostile AI had managed to lure every single staff member into the lower levels of the facility where the husks were. There was no way of knowing how they themselves had also turned into husks, but that wasn't Mordin and Madison's main concern.

Completely pissed off about something trying to kill her daughter, Shepard told Tali to try and disconnect the AI. To everyone else's surprise, Tali had called Legion and asked him to come down to the facility to help. That was the only reason they had been able to reconnect the comm links and turn the lights back on.

_+Creator Tali'Zorah has managed to take control of the security. The elevator is still near the top of the facility. It will take a total of fifty four point four three seconds to arrive at your level.+_

_+Alright, Mordin. Let's get ourselves to that door!+_

Mordin put away his submachine gun and started backing up towards Madison. The husks now came faster than before. He took out his pistol and started taking careful aim as Madison bent down to pick up her submachine gun. They locked eyes and nodded before both of them initiated a cryo blast, clearing the way of any husks. They started working there way back to the path as Madison tried to throw back multiple husks with her biotics, making their way to the elevator.

"Now!"

Mordin jumped down from their hill, landing on a fallen frozen husks chest and shattering it into pieces. Slipping around a little bit on the broken ice, he ran down the small path that Madison had made for him. He started climbing up all the broken metal and other various broken machines until he had reached the elevator. After reaching his destination, he turned around and brought up his pistol, trying to make a similar path for Madison. Madison jumped down, slipping on the ice from the husk that Mordin had landed on. Husks chased her, but Mordin kept shooting at them until he had ran out of thermal clips.

Then they had her.

She slipped foreword and fell on her knees, bringing up her submachine gun to mow down any husks near her as she tried to stand back up. One of the husks had somehow managed to dodge her shots and was now pulling at her arm. Another had also ran up, wrapping it's legs around her waist and pulling her hair.

"Madison!" Mordin panicked. There was nothing he could do as he watched her tech armor and shields die from his omni-tool. However, she had managed to activate her biotic amp and created a giant biotic throw field, knocking back any husks that were on her. With little reaction time, Mordin dropped his pistol next to his feet and used what little he had left of his thermal clip in his submachine gun.

Madison ran to another toppled part of the walkway, heaving herself over the railing. Her pistol had fallen to the ground as a husk ran up behind her and grabbed her hair. She turned around just enough to punch the husk square in the jaw, sending it spinning to the side. Madison quickly picked up her pistol and shot the husk in the temple, sending the bullet flying through the other side of it's head. Another one tried to grab her, but she powered up her biotic amp again. She grabbed the husk with her biotics and banged it up against any hard surface before throwing it far behind her.

Always seeing Madison use her guns or tech abilities had made Mordin remember that Madison's strength was indeed biotics.

_+Is that fucking elevator here yet?+_

_+Twenty seven point five six seconds, Shepard-Lieutenant.+_

It had taken them twenty seven seconds to get to the elevator. It had felt like much longer than that.

Madison tossed her pistol to Mordin as she turned her biotic amp up to full power. A husk had managed to climb it's way up to the elevator, and Madison grabbed it with her biotics, ripping it in half. She shoved another husk to the side, and, as it was sent spinning, Mordin shot a round into its temple. As more husks climbed toward them, they found themselves pinned to the wall. Madison withdrew her submachine gun and shot at only the husks that had managed to cawl up to the elevator.

"I'm out!"

Madison ejected the clip from her gun and threw it to Mordin. "That's the only one we have Mordin! Make it count!"

He started to put it in his pistol but changed his mind and put it in his submachine gun. He brought it up to eye level and began to shoot at their legs to disable them. They didn't need to kill them anymore, they needed to buy time.

And then there were no more clips.

Madison swung her whole body in order to make a throw field big enough to knock back more husks. She drew back again to knock down a fourth, then cryo blasted a fifth. Mordin compacted his submachine gun and went to stand beside her. He punch one in the jaw, sending it flying off the walkway, and he incinerated another. One had latched onto his arm and he sent it into neural shock before shoving it back down to the pit.

They heard a small 'ding' behind them, and they turned to see that the elevator door had opened.

"What are we standing her for? Let's get out of here!" Madison tried to get to the elevator, but a husk crawled up and grabbed her ankle, sending her falling on her hands and knees.

Mordin, now completely annoyed with everything that was happening, grabbed the husk and hurled it off of his partner. After that was dealt with, he grabbed her around the waist and practically threw her into the elevator before diving in after her. He stood and pressed the button on the hologram console so they could be taken back to the main level.

But the elevator doors would never close if there was something in the way of them. A husk shoved it's arm through, and the elevator doors retreated back to the sides.

"God fucking damn it!"

_+Whoever's not overriding the security controls on this fucking elevator is going to get brutally murdered in their sleep tonight!+_

Madison lifted herself up onto her knees, then up to her feet, but Mordin was two steps ahead of her.

He sent the husk into neural shock before she sent a throw field towards it, sending it flying into the wall of husks behind it. Another husk had managed to drag itself into the elevator and Mordin set it on fire, making it run around crazy. But there were way too many of them, and if the doors didn't close soon-

The doors came together so fast that Mordin and Madison didn't even know that it was over. They leant back against the wall, and Madison wiped the sweat from her brow, taking her omni-tool and biotic-amp off her wrists to relax them.

"Mordin, what the fuck just happened?"

He turned to look at her, and he didn't know if it was because they were just in the middle of a near death situation or what. But he had never been more turned on by someone in his life.

There was no time to react when they came sharply together, their lips smashing into each other. It felt like everything around them was collapsing. His thought process had seemed to completely stop as a warmth washed over him from her lips being on his. It was exciting, practically suffocating him, and he wanted so much more from her. All of the tensions that they had been feeling for months began bubbling to the surface as he was being drowned by her hot kisses and the unfamiliar desire to be satisfied.

They broke away for a few milliseconds, catching their breath, before Madison grabbed his arms and pulled him back to her. He had no idea what to do in this situation. He was running on a purely unfamiliar instinct, even when they had first kiss he had just winged it, and her tentative gestures were starting to become stronger and more demanding with each moment that ticked by. He could feel no hesitation on her end. It almost felt like she had been planning for this moment because each touch she gave sent a shock of pure bliss through him that he was absolutely positive only a skilled hand could do.

His hand snaked up her body to the back of her head, entangling his fingers in her hair, and swelled in pride when he felt shivers go down her spine. Her hands were wondering aimlessly until she finally had to grab onto his shoulders to hold herself up because her knees had turned into jelly. He never thought that he could experience so many emotions in one moment, the passion running through his veins like poison.

He moved his hand from her hair to her jawline, keeping a soft, yet firm, grip on her. Her mouth opened, and her tongue came out to tickle his mouth. The moment he opened his mouth to gasp, she dove right in, deepening the kiss and sending unfamiliar, wild sensations surging through his body. He lifted his other hand to her back, pulling her closer. His touch made her shiver, almost violently. His hand came up higher and higher, until they had scraped just under her breast on the far too sensitive area of her ribcage.

She was too much for him. He wasn't sure if he could take much more of it. His legs gave out slightly, stumbling into her, shaking slightly.

She chuckled into his mouth, "I thought salarians had a low sex drive…"

He heard her, but at that moment he couldn't piece together a coherent thought. He was quite literally on the verge of just passing out, for he had never felt so much passion before in his life. All he could do was stand there, staring into her eyes before he answered.

"Only exception…" With one step he had her pressed against the elevator wall. He reached down to her knees and picked her up, enticing her to wrap her legs around his waist. He grabbed her waist, supporting her against the wall, her bright green eyes darkening with pleasure. He lowered his head until he was to her neck before kissing then biting down on the sensitive skin there, eliciting a moan from her throat.

He brought his mouth back up to hers to kiss her passionately, and she accepted him back. She brought her hands up to wrap around his neck. She used her fingers to message the atlas of his spine and then moved to hold his face against hers as his mouth dominated her own.

He could feel his desire building up inside of him. It was starting to get hotter in the elevator, stifling all thought, all sense. He felt as though he might die if he couldn't have more of her. He longed for her- hell, he _needed _her. He had never experienced this crippling feeling of want, and his whole head began to become foggy with a crimson haze as the feeling kept growing stronger and stronger. He felt like a slave to the pleasurable sensations that were running through his body. Everything that had ever defined him was being swept away by this all consuming ecstasy, completely killing all of his senses and blocking out anything that might-

_+WILL SOMEONE ANSWER ME?+_

He let out an irritated cry as he turned his head from hers and brought up his omni-tool.

_+What?+_

Madison let out a whine, she leaned down to his neck and started biting making him-

_+Where the fuck is my daughter, Mordin, and why isn't she answering her comm?+_

_+Took omni-tool off. Wrists needed stretching. One second…+_

Mordin backed away from her, her glare intensifying as he lowered her to her feet. He picked up her omni-tool and bio-amp and handed it back to her. He then proceeded to wrap his arms around her shoulders, kissing her forehead. Her anger instantly evaporated away as she put her tools back onto her wrist, activating the comm link on her omni-tool.

_+What is it, Mom? What do you want?+_

She muted the audio receiver and said to Mordin, "You know, when we get back on the _Normandy_, we have some serious canoodling to do. I just got done with one of the most terrifying missions in my life, I deserve to blow off steam after that."

He smiled at her. "Don't worry," he started. "Will probably have many more opportunities to…relieve stress…"

_+Mom, I can hear you.+_

She giggled as he kissed her face and shoved him back lightly. "Stop it."

_+Madison…God damn it, Madison…+_

_+Mom, what is it?+_

Madison pushed Mordin back and he went without protest, the distraught in Shepard's voice catching his attention, as well.

Mordin felt his stomach tighten as Shepard told them what had happened. He remained silent as Madison turned into a hurricane of anger.

"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?"

**Normandy SR-2, An Hour and a Half Later**

Everyone had needed a little bit of space once they had boarded the _Normandy _again. Mordin already took the hour of sleep he needed, but once he had woken up, he felt strangely empty. He needed to see Madison.

Miranda had gone down to the armory to talk with Jacob. About what, Mordin didn't really know or care. Tali, Grunt, and Jack had all gone up to the mess hall because it felt to lonely in engineering. Surprisingly, Legion had joined them as well. None of them had said anything, but the company was enough for them at the moment. Mordin had met up with Garrus as he was getting out of the elevator. Seeing the wine, Mordin knew that he was probably going up to see Shepard. They had gotten really close lately, and Mordin had insisted they take antihistamine shots just in case something had happened. At first, they thought he was joking, which he didn't fully understand.

When he entered her quarters, he saw her facing the window, her form silhouetted by a near by sun. She heard him enter, but she didn't react or respond to him. He approached her and rested his hands on her shoulders.

"Need rest. Have a long day ahead of us."

When he turned her around to face him, his heart nearly ripped out of his chest. For the minute that their eyes had met, she broke down into a fit of sobs and wails of sorrow.

"I can't..."

Mordin tensed. He had never seen her cry this much.

"I can't do it…I've been so alone all my life…then I found you and…I just can't bear the thought of losing you…I can't…"

As her sobs increased in number and sound, she covered her face with her hands. He could hear as she choked trying to stop the tears, trying to keep herself from crying. Her shoulders heaved with each melancholic breath she took. Mordin frowned and took a step closer to her, bringing her into his arms, shielding her from the universe.

"It's okay, Madison…" he whispered to her. "I'm here…Always will be…"

In that moment, Mordin Solus would be the only one to witness Madison LeeAnn Shepard break.

…

He laid next to her, her back turned to him, his arm wrapped over her shoulders, and his cheek pressing into hers. Her body, her skin, was all but a soft shell, protecting her heart that was way stronger than he could ever imagine a heart to be. He thanked the gods that he had met her. He felt honored to have been a close friend to her and fight next to her. But, for some reason, fate had smiled upon him when she had fallen in love with him.

But those feelings couldn't compare to the feeling he got when he was privileged enough to see her in her weakest moments. Those moments when she couldn't carry the universe on her shoulders anymore and just let it fall down and crash around her. Mordin knew that he would never be the perfect mate for her. He couldn't protect her because she never really needed protection. She would leave and go do her duties no matter how she felt about it. She had to do what needed to be done. But he promised her that he would always be there for her when she felt like nothing was going right for her. To shelter her when she needed it.

She turned over, putting her own arm around his body, and nuzzling her head in the crook of his neck. Their legs wrapped around each other, and she sighed contentedly. He wanted her there, in his arms, forever. But he knew that soon, their battle - probably the final battle in both of their very short lives - was coming closer and closer by the second. Where had the time gone? Had they ever had the time, or had it just gone by so fast that they didn't even notice? He didn't remember, but he swore to himself that he wouldn't waste these last few moments with her.

"Mordin," he heard her whisper. He looked down and met her beautiful green eyes. "I love-"

**The Collector Base, Presently**

"Mordin."

He was pulled out of his memory by Shepard as she spoke his name.

"Hmm?" he looked around at everyone who was staring at him.

He heard Madison clear her throat loudly and saw her jerk her head, indicating that he needed to join them on the platform. Shepard raised a brow and chuckled. He had been caught dumb which was a rarity to see. He had no idea what to say or do. But he stepped foreword up onto the platform and stood next to Madison.

"Are you ready?" she whispered to him as he took his place next to her.

He smiled and turned his head to look at her. "Are _you _ready?"

As Shepard began making her final speech, he had only eyes for Madison. He felt like the puzzle was finally coming together, and it left him with a strangely calm feeling. He knew it then. That he would live. That she would live. They would _both_ live.

He was never going to let her go. Never.

He would face Death in all of its forms and deny it their lives.

He was _hers. _And she was _his._

"I'm _so_ ready for this.


	9. Look After You

Chapter 9

_"My love, she leans into me." - The Fray_

Madison watched as the scion got shot straight in the forehead, the bullet coming out the other side. The scion fell backwards off of the platform, down into the dark chasm.

Madison stood there for a moment, watching the scion as it fell, before lifting her head back up to examine the opening to their next destination. This was the end of this gruesome mission. It had all started when they had entered the Omega 4 Relay, looking to save their crew, but ended up also facing a near death experience as they flew into the Galactic Core. No, that wasn't the beginning. It had all started when the Collector ship had killed her mother and almost destroyed Madison's life.

Or perhaps her whole journey had begun when she had met a man that she thought wouldn't affect her life. A man that would eventually become the most important person to her in the galaxy. The man that had annoyed and frustrated her when they had first met. The man that had tore her from death's claws.

_+Mordin, don't you dare say that another platform is coming. Don't even think about it. If one shows up, I'll assume that you've been indoctrinated, and I'll be forced to kill you.+_

Madison giggled and turned to look at Mordin. He was by some dead Collectors, searching their bodies for extra thermal clips.

_+Of course. Will think about what I've done. What's the human expression? "My bad?"+_

Mordin approached Madison, handing her a few clips. When she reached for them, He grabbed her hand with his free hand and pulled her a bit closer to him. She blushed.

_+Glad that we've come to an understanding. Now stop staring at my daughter like that. She's losing her focus.+_

Madison's blush darkened, and she left Mordin to go stand by her mother behind the console. Shepard examined the tubes and followed them with her eyes down to a small opening in the gigantic corridor.

"Well, I'm pretty sure that's the end. If we have to go farther, I'm going to be a pretty pissed off commander."

"Okay," Madison answered. "Let's get this over with then."

Shepard placed her hands on the console but hesitated. When she didn't move, Madison crossed her arms and arched a brow.

"Mom?"

She reached up to her headset and turned off the audio receiver. She turned to Madison, her face lined with extreme exhaustion and agitation. "I can't just leave them behind, Madison. What if…What if what happened on Virmire, happens here?"

Madison stepped foreword. She tried to grab her mother's shoulder to turn her away from the console, but Shepard jerked out of her grasp.

"You don't need to comfort me, Madison. I may be pissed off, but I can't let it get in the way of my mission."

Madison smiled and went back to crossing her arms. Shepard gave her a glare. "Don't you dare say a word, Madison." Shepard turned away and activated the console, taking the trio to their next - and perhaps final - battle. Madison faked a dramatic grin and pressed her hands to her heart.

"Oh, they grow up so fast."

"Madison, I wish I could still ground you."

As the platform continued on it's path, Madison turned her head to look at Mordin. He was back to scanning the dead Collectors with his omni-tool. She pat her mother on the back before joining Mordin at his side.

"How are you?"

Mordin looked past her at her mother. He directed his attention back to Madison, "Fine. No need to worry."

Madison held his hand. "Thanks."

"Please, Madison. She's your mother. Might be last battle. Won't get in the way of last goodbyes."

Madison glared at him. "How can you say something like that? We're not going to die."

"Sorry," he apologized. "Poor choice of words. Didn't mean _that_."

_+Hey, lovebirds. Get your asses over here.+_

Madison blushed again, keeping her eyes down as they approached her mother. They were nearing the end of the tunnel.

_+EDI. What can you tell me about the tubes? What's going through them, and where are they leading?+_

_+The tubes are leading to some sort of incomplete superstructure, Shepard. However, what's feeding through them is organic and non-organic matter.+_

Madison followed the tubes with her eyes. They led to a vast chasm bathed in a haze of yellow light. Something obscured by the entrance had long thick tubes dangling from it, with just a little bit of the superstructure being seen near the top of the entrance. Madison thought it looked something like…a spine? No. That couldn't be what it was.

Shepard and Mordin followed Madison's gaze, trying to examine it.

_+Shepard, I'm pretty sure the superstructure is…+_

Madison's hearing went completely silent as she stared in horror at the monstrous machine before her, greatly increasing their odds of not surviving. There in front of them, bathed in yellow light, suspending from four thick tubes, hanging from the ceiling…was a Reaper. The Reaper wasn't like Sovereign or Harbinger, though. After all, this Reaper had a spine.

_+That's not simply a Reaper, EDI…+_

Shepard's mouth parted slightly as she assessed what was actually going on in the Collector base.

_+That's a _human _Reaper…+_

_+You are correct, Commander. However, it appears that the Reaper is not yet complete. It will need significantly more humans before it can be operational.+_

_+But it's just a shell, right?+_

_+I don't have the information to confirm or deny that. But it appears that the Collectors are being used by the Reapers. The knowledge and technology the Collectors are using are obviously provided by the Reapers. The Collectors are constructing the new Reaper.+_

So this was Reaper "reproduction"… Madison let out a wavering breath.

_+But it's human. Why does it look like that?+_

_+From the data I've collected so far, it's logical to assume that the Reapers take shape of the species used to create it.+_

At EDI's words, Madison's eyes shot up to examine the four tubes connected to the Reaper. She saw the yellow, thick liquid that flowed into it. The liquified humans were being inserted into the Reaper. It made her nauseous.

Shepard was getting aggravated as she tried to make sense of what EDI was telling her.

_+But that can't be right. It's a machine. It shouldn't need humans at all.+_

_+Actually, Shepard, Reapers are a hybrid of organic _and _inorganic life. Though the method of construction is vague, I assume that the Reapers take the traits of the species it absorbs to better themselves in a sense.+_

Madison felt herself getting light headed. She stepped back and leaned into Mordin, who rested his hand on her lower back to support her.

_+How many more humans do they need to complete it?+_

_+Hundreds of thousand. Maybe even millions. Or more. This Reaper looks like it's still in its earlier stages of development.+_

Madison placed a hand on her forehead. "We've gotta somehow get rid of a fucking Reaper fetus now. As if our plate isn't full enough…" Then Madison's eyes widened. "Oh my God…" She turned around and grabbed Mordin's face, shaking it as she had her revelation. "They're trying to make themselves stronger! This baby Reaper is their Plan B!" The gears in Madison's head started spinning as she turned around and pointed at the Reaper. "Yes, the Reapers are already a dangerous foe, but Mom managed to _kill _Sovereign. The Reapers see the threat we humans really are. They now see us as a stronger race. They're trying to make human reapers to help with the genocide."

"Hmm…" Mordin hummed. Shepard and Madison focused their attention on him. "Millions of races used to reproduce Reapers. Make them stronger. Question is, how many more?" Mordin lifted a fist up to his mouth as he tried to figure out the organic machine before them.

Shepard turned and glared up at the sapient being. "I'll tell you how many more. None. I don't care if it kills me, the Reapers will be stopped," Shepard pressed her fingers to her ear.

_+EDI, is there anything you can tell me about the Reaper? Any weaknesses we should know about?+_

_+I'm performing a scan now, Shepard. It seems that the tubes are a structural weakness. If you can manage to disconnect the Reaper from them somehow, it'll fall and more than likely be destroyed.+_

_+Well, the Collectors are dumber than we originally thought.+_

"Shepard. In response to your previous comment…Don't kill me."

Shepard raised an eyebrow at him before turning to see an approaching platform coming towards their own platform.

"Well, this situation just got a bit more complicated."

Madison slid into cover and took out her pistol. A rising glowing Collector caught her attention, and she took aim.

"Oh, look. Harbinger wants to play to."

Mordin managed to get a couple of shots in before taking cover next to Madison. Shepard jumped over their cover to a closer position, taking out her shotgun.

"THIS HURTS YOU."

"Really, Sweetie? 'Cause I don't feel a fucking thing!"

A few seconds later, Harbinger was no more, dissipating through the air in a mass of black ash. Madison, who had somehow gotten hit by one of Harbinger's attacks and was currently still on fire, shot a Collector with a throw field, sending it flying off the platform. Mordin lifted up from cover and shot another twice in the head before it fell completely dead.

"The tubes are exposed!"

Madison followed Mordin's gaze and pulled out her submachine gun to help out her mother. Shepard had withdrawn her assault rifle and aimed at a tube.

After Shepard had finished off one tube, she switched her targeting to help Madison with her tube. The second tube shattered within seconds, and the yellow liquid that was being pumped into the Reaper splattered and over flowed, leaving streak marks down the Reaper's metal shell. The Reaper hung low as it dangled from one arm, its head sagging to the side, leaving it's mouth wide open. Madison was so transfixed by the organic machine that she didn't notice the oncoming platform full of Collectors. One shot at her with a particle beam, and she ducked back down into cover. Her tech armor was more than fifty percent damaged.

"God damn it…"

"Need to be more careful!"

"WE ARE HARBINGER."

"You know, FUCK MY LIFE!"

Madison lifted up out of cover and took aim at Harbinger. She let out an infuriated war cry as she emptied out the rest of her thermal clip into the glowing Collector. She then powered up her biotic amp and threw a cryo blast at it. Mordin grabbed her hand and pulled her back down into cover.

"Mordin, we can't defeat our enemies if we hide from them all the time!" she shouted as she slammed a thermal clip into her submachine gun.

"Won't defeat anyone if dead, Madison!"

"If you two are done arguing, there's a wall of Collectors that need to be killed."

Madison lifted herself up to activate another cryo blast. Mordin let his new protective instinct kick in as he activated an incinerate to protect her.

"Madison! Throw them back!"

Madison threw out a throw field, and Shepard followed her pursuit by adding her fire. She panicked slightly when she saw how close Harbinger was to Shepard. Shepard reached out and grabbed the general, slamming him into the ground. As Shepard caught on fire, Madison almost lifted her hand to palm her face. Shepard planted her foot on Harbinger's chest and finished off her thermal clip on the Collector's head.

Mordin managed to kill the last of the Collectors as Harbinger boomed out.

"WE ARE UNSTOPPABLE."

"Whatever!"

Madison looked up at the Reaper as the metal armor on the tubes descended, revealing the yellow liquid. "Mom! The tubes!"

Shepard reloaded her assault rifle and turned around to shoot at the last of the tubes. Madison lifted her submachine gun and helped. The tubes exploded shortly after.

And just like that, the Reaper fell. It dropped down, jerking at the cables that attached it to the ceiling. As it leaned forward, some of the liquified humans bubbled over where the tubes were connected. The cables, straining from the extra weight added to them, eventually broke, sending the baby Reaper into the darkness below.

"Take that, mother fucker!"

Shepard and Mordin walked away from the side of the platform, leaving Madison staring down at the shrinking Reaper.

She felt a chill go down her spine and settle in her stomach.

_There's no way it can be that easy…_

She turned to her mother just as she had pressed her fingers to her ear.

_+Shepard to Fire Team. What's your status?+_

As Miranda radioed a reply to Shepard, Madison took her place next to her mother who was now kneeling down next to the exposed primary power control unit. Madison's omni-tool started blinking "Incoming call: Illusive Man".

"Mom? The Illusive Man's calling. Should I answer?"

Shepard made a grunt of approval, and Madison keyed in the transmission code.

_+Shepard, I'm sure I don't need to tell you of your success?+_

Shepard rolled her eyes before replying. "I didn't do it on my own. I had a damn good team watching my back the whole time. Now it's time to blow this place sky high."

_+Shepard, stop…+_

Madison's eyes narrowed at the mini projection of the Illusive Man.

_+There's a reasonably better solution that we can all benefit from. EDI has sent me a schematic, and I'm currently looking over it. You could key in a timed radiation pulse that would kill every Collector in the base and still keep their technology completely intact.+_

Madison made an 'Are you fucking serious?' face and looked at Mordin. The salarian scientist openly chuckled amusedly at the forwardness the Illusive Man was showing. Shepard may have been the type of person that would accept any help she could get, but she wouldn't dare use Collector technology even if it would help her. She would most definitely never hand over any Collector technology to the person that she least trusted out of everyone in the galaxy. Shepard slowly lifted herself up from the ground and turned to glare at the Illusive Man. It had been a while since Madison had seen that look in her mother's eyes. It was her 'If you were here right now, I would fucking kill you' look. Madison hadn't ever seen her mother get truly angry before, and she found herself wanting the Illusive Man to egg her mother on.

He did not disappoint her.

_+This might be the only chance we'll ever get, Shepard. The Collectors were building a _Reaper_. Having that knowledge could help us win this war.+_

"You're_ joking_, right? These…monsters kidnapped and brutally murdered innocent human beings, and you want to _use that_? And you think I'd be stupid enough to just hand these over to a fucking traitor jackass like you? I don't fucking think so. I started this mission, _we _started this mission, with the goal of destroying this base, and I am not going to abandon that."

_+But Shepard just think of all the-+_

Shepard let out a groan of fury, interrupting the holographic man. Madison smiled knowing fully well that the Illusive man had just managed to piss off the most powerful, unstoppable person in all the galaxy. "Fuck you!" Shepard turned back to the control unit and started keying in the code for the bomb.

_+Shepard, you're making a mistake! We _need _this base!+_

"Like I give a shit about what you need."

_+Shepard, just listen to me. You died fighting for this war, to protect the galaxy. I brought you back because I knew you would make the right choices and bring back the hope that everyone needed. Maybe what we did was wrong, but you've accomplished so much more than you did before! We, Cerberus, brought you back because we knew your potential. But you can't just throw away a war asset that could end this war before the Reapers even get to us. Please, rethink your decision!+_

Shepard stopped her typing and turned around sharply toward Madison. Pointing a finger, she projected back to the hologram, "Shut the fuck up! I didn't die because I wanted to protect the galaxy, I died because a Collector ship attacked the _Normandy, _and I was spaced because the Reapers were afraid that I would defeat them if I didn't get destroyed. And don't even get me started with Cerberus! You brought me back because you're a selfish bastard and needed me to do all the dirty work _for you._ But you gave me complete control of this mission and allowed me to make any decision I wanted to make. And my decision is that we don't fucking need this base. I. Am. Destroying. It."

_+Let's not do anything rash now, Shepard. I understand that you hate Cerberus, but-+_

"Oh, please. Yeah, I hate Cerberus, but that's completely beside the point. You always had the idea that you were in control of this mission because you had all the information. But here's a news flash for you, jackass. I am and always have been in control since the very beginning. We both wanted to get rid of the Collectors and stop the Reapers, and so I accepted some of your information. I'm not doing anything different than what I did before. I'm still making my own decisions, and I'm sticking by them."

The Illusive Man tried to speak again, but Madison had gotten so fed up with hearing him try to pointlessly reason with her mom that she hung up on him. She then proceeded to reach into one of her belt pockets and tossed the detonation charge to her mother. Shepard caught it with ease.

Madison raised her eyebrows in fake fear. "This isn't gonna be like Virmire, is it? I mean I wasn't there, but it wasn't too pleasant hearing all the stories…" Shepard let out a sigh and turned around to continue setting the charge. "Mordin, I think she's going to blow us up."

"Hmm. Best to start running then," Mordin said, pressing a fist to his mouth.

Shepard pressed the core back down into the floor and locked it into place. "We gotta go. We've got exactly ten minutes to book it back to the _Normandy _before-"

The whole facility shook in a violent wave, sending Madison to her knees. Mordin came to her side instantly to help her up.

"Malfunction in platform, perhaps?" he guessed.

"Yeah, there's no way in hell, Mordin…" Madison groaned. She turned her head to see what was up. Her eyes widened in horror and her jaw fell, leaving her mouth completely open. The Reaper had somehow climbed all the way back up to them.

"Fuck…my…life…" Madison seemed to be getting very acquainted with that phrase as of late.

Everything around Madison seemed to stop as she stared at the metallic being before her. There was no way they would be able to stand a chance against this thing. They were dog tired and beaten organics that had nothing but a few guns running low on ammunition, and maybe a few more charges of tech and biotic abilities, to protect themselves. Madison then had another revelation: she had lied to Mordin. They really were going to die.

The Reaper slammed its hands down on the platform, sending the team falling violently with each shockwave. The Reaper opened its mouth and the red apparatus inside of it started to glow. Madison shook her head to regain her thoughts and return to the reality that told her that she was about to face a tough battle that might very well end her short life. The trio scattered to different protrusions of metal, the red beam of light just narrowly missing them.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Shepard yelled in a fit of rage.

They lifted themselves up out of cover to see that the Reaper had lost it's balance and fell back down, a single hand hanging on for dear life. The Reaper tried to raise itself up again, but only got one yellow eye above the platform before falling limply down again.

"Fuck my life," Madison repeated. "Just fuck it. Fuck my life."

"Platform incoming!" At Mordin's words, they all withdrew their weapons and went back to squatting behind cover.

"What the fuck are we supposed to do?" Madison shouted in utter terror.

"What we always do! We're going to kill it!" Shepard answered.

Madison widened her eyes at her mother. "What? You're crazy!"

"No, I'm not! Listen, I'm going to focus on the Reaper. You two, you just put your energy into the Collectors. Remember, if you see Harbinger, take it out quickly," Shepard began to crawl past them to find a different angle to shoot from.

"It's coming back!" Mordin shouted as he pointed up at the Reaper. The Reaper leaned over their cover, letting it's mouth fall open and began glowing once again.

"Didn't Sovereign use that same attack on the Arcturus Fleet a couple years ago?" Shepard asked completely out of nowhere.

"We don't know, Mom! We weren't there!" Madison yelled as a bullet collided with her tech armor.

"Why aren't we dead yet?"

Mordin was the one that answered this time. "Reaper is not fully developed. Unable to generate enough power to execute."

The beam rushed passed them, each of them noticing how much their kinetic barrier percentage had decreased.

"Trust me…It's definitely generating enough power to kill us," Madison growled.

"Collectors aren't shooting."

Madison raised an eyebrow at Mordin and turned to see her mother lifting her head up out of cover. When there were no sounds of fire, Madison lifted her head up to take a peak, only to see the Reaper losing its balance once again and absolutely no trace of any Collectors. The Reaper had actually killed the Collectors itself.

"Hmm," Mordin hummed. "Luck favors us."

"Madison, don't you dare move from this spot."

Madison glared at the back of her mother who was retreating to another platform. "Where do you think you're going?"

Shepard ignored the cries of her daughter and bent over to pick something up. Madison realized what Shepard was doing. She was getting extra thermal clips.

The sound of a large object crashing down upon metal caught the trio's attention. They watched as a platform near Shepard's had completely fallen, the Reaper looming over where it once had been before falling back down.

Madison shot up and desperately tried to go help her mother. Mordin grabbed her arm and pointed up.

"Another platform!"

Madison widened her eyes as the moving platform magnetically connected with the platform Shepard was standing on. After Shepard had ducked down into cover, a Collector had lifted up, glowing bright yellow and catching everyone's attention.

Madison swore loudly and reloaded her submachine gun, making sure every bullet made contact with Harbinger's skin. But the Collector just kept getting closer and closer to Shepard.

"FACE YOUR ANNIHILATION."

Madison tightened her grip around her gun as she stared the Reaper-possessed Collector down. _Prepare to die, ass hole._ Madison finished off a Collector by throwing it off the platform after Mordin had sent out a neural shockwave, but a sudden movement distracted Madison and she looked back to her mother. She was using her pistol while she kept going in and out of cover, her shields decreasing at a quick pace.

That was not what had gotten Madison's attention, though. Madison watched in horror, her mouth hanging wide open, as the Reaper lifted itself back on the platform and raising a hand over her mom, the hand making a distinct shadow serving as a target. She started flailing her arms around dramatically, trying to get her mom's attention while calling out to her. Madison couldn't tell if Shepard had seen her or if she had simply seen the Reaper, but Shepard quickly rolled out of cover as the hand came crashing down. But she was out of cover now and also a perfect target for the Collectors.

Shepard quickly rolled back into cover and distributed a medi-gel into her suit's interface. Her mother could do well in a gunfight, but she was tiring. If she went any longer without help, she could die.

"Mordin, we have to help her!"

"Go, Madison! Will hold them off!" Mordin, somewhat heroically, leapt out of cover and made sure every other Collector was completely focused on him. He was going to protect her. Madison found that there was no time to thank him as she jumped out of cover after him and bolted towards her mother. Madison saw in the corner of her eye that the Reaper had opened it's mouth again, readying it's death ray.

Harbinger, who was still not dead despite the hundreds of bullets Madison had planted in it's body, was using everything he had against Shepard. She watched as Shepard distributed another medi-gel. Shepard would never use two medi-gel packs in a row if she didn't truly need it.

Harbinger hopped over the last bit of cover between it and her mother, powering up a biotic blast and aiming it at Shepard.

Shepard filled her eyes with every ounce of hate she could muster, daring the Collector to kill her.

_Mom, you fucking dumbass!_

Madison increased her running speed as Harbinger continued to charge up his blast. She powered up her biotic amp and sent an exploding overload right into it, completely disintegrating its barrier and stoping it from firing its own biotic blast. As Harbinger turned to see what had breached its defenses, Madison completed her sprint by landing right in front of Harbinger. She focused all her biotic power into her fist and slammed it into the Collector's face in a powerful biotic wave (something Jack had taught her when she had been recruited). With every last bit of her biotic charge she activated a warp that was so powerful that it sent Harbinger flying backwards.

As Harbinger burned away in front of them, Madison picked up her mother, wrapping an arm around Shepard's waist to help her. As they reached the cover, Madison hurled her mother and herself over just as the Reaper fired out it's red beam. Madison's tech armor got blown away as she was getting behind the cover.

Shepard reached over her shoulder, and her sniper rifle unfolded in her hands and aimed the sight directly at one of the Reaper's yellow eyes. Madison took out her pistol and started helping her mother with the eye. Mordin was behind them covering them from the remaining Collectors, unharmed by the beam the Reaper had unleashed upon them. He abandoned his post and joined them in the attack against the eye.

The Reaper then ducked back down out of the line of fire. Almost instantly, the trio shifted back their attention to the remaining Collectors.

After a short while, they heard the familiar sound of metal crashing down on metal. The team turned themselves away and ran to another platform. As they jumped up on to the new vantage point, the other platform fell in a clutter of metal and debris into the darkness. The Reaper popped up, catching Mordin and Madison's attention. Madison quickly reloaded her pistol and aimed at the eye once again. Mordin joined her a few seconds later, so had Shepard. Madison let out an irritated groan as her pistol ran out of bullets. She holstered it and picked up a near by particle beam that one of the Collectors had dropped. She poured the remaining power it had into the Reaper's eye.

Then the defenses were gone.

The Reaper pulled back an arm as it's right eye exploded, yellow liquid gushing out of it. Mordin quickly grabbed Madison's arm and pulled her away just as the arm came crashing down onto the platform. Madison threw the particle beam and took out her submachine gun, following Mordin blindly. They jumped and tumbled onto a platform that had just appeared. Mordin grabbed Madison's arm and continued to drag her along as she fired at any and all remaining Collectors. Everything was being torn apart by the enraged Reaper. Collectors went tumbling down into the abyss, as well as a glowing one that had just been possessed by Harbinger.

Mordin released Madison as they had joined Shepard at the edge of another platform. The commander turned back to them and yelled at them just as the platform beneath them shifted violently, sending them flying through the air. Mordin was lucky enough to land on the stable platform with Shepard, but Madison was sent tumbling down the inclined, broken platform. She was getting closer and closer to the end leading into the bottomless pit.

She heard someone call out her name, and she looked up to see Mordin sliding down, reaching his hand out to grab her. She reached out to him and their fingers enclosed over each other's wrists. She felt her chest scrape over the edge, and, before she knew it, she was dangling from Mordin's hand.

_Goodbye. _Her eyes screamed to him.

He glared down at her. _Like hell._

She felt them skid to a stop, her shoulder feeling like it was being pulled out of socket. Somehow, Mordin must've grabbed something to keep them from falling any farther. She heard a crash followed by an explosion down below her feet. She looked down to see a large inferno below them. The Reaper was destroyed. A few seconds later, the wind from the explosion lifted her out of the pit over Mordin, pulling him after her. The platform started moving downward as the facility was in the beginning stages of its destruction. Their hands ripped apart as they came to a stop on the platform Shepard was clumsily keeping her balance on.

Madison looked up and saw Mordin over her trying to cradle her in his arms. She took his hand and squeezed it until she was sure the limbs were aching under her grip. She looked past his face and saw a platform hurdling towards their own.

There was a crash as they were ripped away from each other.

…

Mordin slowly opened his eyes, trying to shift under the pressure against his chest. His left arm could move, but all the rest of him was pinned down under a thick sheet of green metal. He tried to grab hold of Madison, only to find that she was no longer in his grasp.

_Madison…_

He lifted his hand and tried to push the metal off of him. Where was she? He had to find her.

"Madi-" he broke into a fit of coughing and blood came oozing out of his mouth.

He didn't take notice of it. The base was fixing to explode and he had to find Madison soon or else- He heard the screeching of metal, and the pressure on his chest was slowly being lifted off him. Then he saw her. She knelt down next to him and lifted his head onto her lap, wandering why he wasn't feeling any pain. Her lips came to his, but only for a brief, intoxicating five seconds before retreating back. He lifted up his hand and stroked her jaw, the doctor in him examining her wounds. A thick gash had opened at the base of her hairline, and the blood oozed over her left eye. He was surprised at what little damage she had taken, but he didn't really take notice of it.

He was just happy that she was alive.

He felt his insides tingle as Shepard distributed some medi-gel into his system.

"We can't stay here," she coughed. "We have to go. _Now!"_

The bomb…

Mordin let out a groan as Madison helped him up. Shepard was speedily limping away through a tunnel that he didn't even notice until his mind had refocused. Mordin spared a few seconds to examine their surroundings. He noticed that the only reason why they had lived was because the platform had gotten wedged between a column of metal and rock, slowing down their fall. Luck was definitely favoring them that day.

He let out a bitter chuckle and broke into a run next to Madison. They probably owed their lives to luck. Not only had luck saved their lives, it was luck that had brought the two of them together. He took Madison's hand as she started lagging behind him.

He found himself constantly thinking about how they had actually found each other. How they could've easily just not taken notice of each other when he was recruited. How they could've found someone else. But they had stumbled into each other. He fell for her, and she fell for him. And they would never let go of each other. Never.

Mordin's thoughts stopped coming to him as the _Normandy _sped into his view. He let Madison in first, helping her up as Joker lifted up an assault rifle to help with any Collectors coming for them. She limped into the arms of Samara who led her to a waiting Chakwas, ready to aid them if needed, which it was needed. Jack and Legion were behind Joker, Jack using powerful biotics on the Seeker swarms, and Legion using his assault rifle with Joker's. He noticed Tali was using her combat drone, controlling it from her omni-tool. Grunt was there as well, using his shotgun against anyone that got close. He looked to the side to see Thane and Garrus using their sniper rifles, shooting at the ones behind Shepard.

It was inspiring to see all of them there trying to save the one person they owed everything to.

Once he was sure Madison was safe and secure, he jumped in next, hearing the Collector base moan because of the reactor beginning to detonate. He rolled into the airlock just as a huge piece of debris landed and crushed the platform he had just been on, widening the jump Shepard would have to make to get back on the _Normandy_. He heard a feminine cry and saw Madison tearing through everyone to jump out to her mother.

_No! _He quickly got up and grabbed her around her waist, lifting her up off the ground. "Madison!"

Madison didn't listen to him. She began to glow blue as she powered up her biotics, dragging Mordin foreword slowly. He felt everyone grab him as she pulled him foreword. When Shepard jumped, she to also began to glow, and he realized that Madison was going to pull her in. With a jerk of Madison's hands, Shepard came flying in at a steadily increasing speed, the ship rocking backwards as the clutter of people impacted on the back wall. Joker proceeded to lock the doors shut and hobble over to the ship controls.

_+Detonation in 10…9…+_

"Alright, EDI, we get it!" Joker yelled.

"Hurry up!" Shepard screamed frantically. "We have to go now, Joker!"

"You don't think I know that? I can't concentrate with you yelling at- Shit! Brace yourselves!"

However, nobody could really think to grab hold of something as the _Normandy'_s mass effect drives went into full drive. Jack had slammed into a wall, creating a dent that could keep her clumsily balanced. Tali was tumbling everywhere, as was Miranda. Grunt fell back into Samara and Thane who both let out uncomfortable groans. Madison was down on all fours with Mordin sitting beside her and holding her waist to keep her steady. He could hear EDI, Shepard, and Joker all yelling at each other as they were piloting the ship. Then the FTL drives kicked in…There was silence ringing through the air…

"I…I think we're good," Joker said, uncertainly. "Unless the _Normandy_'s hell…" Then he smiled and broke into a fit of laughs. "We did it! We fucked those Collectors!"

Everyone broke out into cheers of laughter, joy, crying…Emotions flew through the air as crew members jumped, hugged, and clapped. Chakwas had ran up to the pit to hug Joker. Miranda and Jacob had collided in a hug, as well. Thane leaned against the door of the airlock, his hands pressed together in a silent prayer. Jack had pressed her back to the wall and slid down to the base, pressing her hand to her face. Tali was next to Grunt jumping up and down while he let out an intense krogan roar, lifting his arms up as high as they could go. Shepard and Garrus stood next to each other as they had a moment of staring and smiling at each other. Samara was the least animated, smiling with tear-filled eyes, and Legion standing next to her just examining them all.

Mordin stood and moved to help Madison up, holding his hand out to her. She smiled up at him before taking it and standing up with him. They just stood there in the middle of it all, staring into each other's eyes and smiling. He lifted his other hand to cup her chin.

Eight months ago they had met to carry on a suicide mission, and here they were eight months later, alive. He felt his heart flutter in his chest as he thought about their future now that it was theirs to have.

"I love you so much, Mordin."

"I love you to."

He leaned in to kiss her, but she planted a hand on his chest and pushed him back.

"Everyone's watching."

"Feelings were clumsily hidden. Everyone knows. No point in hiding it anymore."

"Okay, scratch that. My _mom's _watching."

"Hmm. Doesn't scare me."

"It should."

"Well, it doesn't." He then grabbed her around her waist and forcefully crashed her into his body, he dipped his head down and kissed her. She made a muffled sound in his mouth before lifting her hands up to his face.

He had been brave through all his STG missions, when he had suffered injuries to his face and horn. He had been brave on Tuchanka, when he had helped make the modified genophage. He had been brave on Omega, when the Blue Suns had threatened his life and his clinic. He had even been brave on the Collector Base, where any one of them could've died at any moment. But he had never been more scared in his life whenever Mama Shepard started threatening to "beat his ass" if he touched her daughter in front of her like that again.

Kenneth and Gabby made jokes about it for weeks, but everyone knew that they were bound to come together someday.


	10. Ocean Wide (RATED R!)

Chapter 10

_"We'll swim in the tears we've cried. They'll see us through to the other side.  
__We're gonna make it." - The Afters_

The _Normandy _continued to fly peacefully through space, the danger ceasing temporarily. The crew knew that this wasn't the worst it was going to be, so most of them made plans to leave the starship. Samara was getting off at the next port, her justicar duties called for it. Thane was going to go back to the Citadel to be with Kolyat. Tali was going back to the Flotilla. The only ones that we're going to be staying long term were Miranda, Jacob, Garrus, Jack, Grunt, Legion, and maybe Madison and Mordin. Mordin was planning on going back to Sur'Kesh, but he didn't know if Madison would want to live there with him. He was giving her a few days to decide.

"Hey…Mordin."

Mordin came back to reality and turned away from his work. He ignored the aching in his body as he met the eyes of Shepard. Compared to Shepard and other crew members, what Mordin was feeling was child's play to everyone else's injuries. Shepard had gotten multiple cracked and broken bones, including her wrist which was in a cast. She had also had some internal bleeding, which they had been able to stop before it got too serious. And she had also started developing insomnia because of some reoccurring nightmares.

There were many other injuries he could list, but those were just minor compared to the rest.

"I assume you're doing fine?" The question was very formal, and it made Mordin inwardly laugh. Ever since she had seen him kiss her daughter it had put a wedge in between their relationship and made it professional. Probably for the sake of Madison, if something happened.

"Yes. You're well to?"

She nodded and continued on. "Madison's up in her room right now. I think she wanted to see you," Shepard handed him the data pad in her hands. "You should give this to her. It's a list of houses and apartments for sale on Sur'Kesh," she started to walk away then added. "You should look at it to. I don't really know much about salarian living environments, but if you're going to be living with each other, you should have a say in where you guys live."

Mordin glanced down and met Shepard's back as she was walking away. "Okay with this?"

"No," she said as the door out of the lab opened. "It's her life, though. And I'm letting her decide her future."

He examined the data pad as the door closed behind her. He felt a strange sense of completion fill him to his core. Though nothing between them would change, it felt somewhat relaxing to know that she would be living with him where he could protect her. It felt right.

He closed the screen and made his way out to the elevator. He had gone years without anyone to call his own, being completely alone. Now, he had a purpose, a reason to keep going. There was no way in hell that he was going to live without her now.

When he stepped out into the Crew's Quarter's and in Madison's room, he was greeted by darkness. She sat on the couch, reading an e-book he had downloaded for her. Mordin smiled down at her, taking the data pad out of her hands and laughing as she glared at him. He offered her his hand, and she raised an eyebrow at it questioningly. As she took it, she was immediately jerked up off her couch and into a crazy waltz type dance. He sang to her and twirled her, just like he had done whenever he had told her about the time he was in the musical _Gilbert and Sullivan_.

When they had stopped, Mordin looked into her eyes, a question lingering in his mind. Lingering on the night before the Collector Base.

_'Mordin, I love you…' _she had whispered to him. That thought snapped him back into the present. Back to the strong, beautiful woman he was holding in his arms.

"Madison?" he questioned.

"Yeah? What's wrong?" she answered, furrowing her brows together.

"You meant what you said? You love me?"

"Of course I did," she said, letting out an amused breath. "Why would you be asking that?"

"Just curious… Wanted to know, why me?"

Madison tilted her head and smiled at him. "There, honestly, is no reason," she said, lifting her hand up to his cheek. "I have and always will love you."

Mordin felt the feeling of completion fill him again, so full that he could burst. She was it for him. She was _his _love. And he was hers.

"I love you so much," he whispered. Then their lips met in a gentle, heart-felt kiss.

Madison sighed into the kiss as she wrapped her arms around the salarian's neck. Suddenly, the memory of them in the elevator after the horde of husks came into her mind, exciting her and a burst of electricity broke through her body and settled in her abdomen. She groaned into the kiss, wanting so much more than what he was giving her. Her hands grasped his face, forcing their mouths to stay locked together, and she pressed her body firmly against him. Mordin moaned along with her, helping her indulge in her addiction that was named 'Mordin'.

Uncontrollably, Mordin's hands found their way to the hem of her shirt, then slipping underneath to caress her ribcage. Madison gasped as she felt his gloves touch her skin, and she gave Mordin a lustful look that soon had him tearing off his gloves and sending them to the floor. Smiling, he traced his fingers up and down her spine and up her stomach. When his fingers brushed over the fabric of her bra, they got thrown into a whole new world. Madison took in a quick gasp as Mordin continued his exploration.

Letting out a sigh, she leaned foreword and continued to kiss him, letting him slide her top off, her bra soon joining it. Almost immediately, she lifted her hands to his shoulders and slid his coat off to join her clothes on the ground. Her hands then quickly traveled to the back of his neck, where the zipper to his body suit was. Once her hands had gotten a firm hold on it, she pulled the zipper down harshly. Soon, she was pulling it off his shoulders and down to his waist. Now, they were free to explore the upper halves of their bodies.

Mordin wouldn't have ever believed that this would happen to him. He never thought that a beautiful, young woman would be wanting him like this, kissing him, holding him, leading him to her bed. It was hers, and it smelled exactly like her, enticing him to join with her on it. He scooped up his love and laid her down on top of the covers. Mordin joined her and perched himself on his hands and knees above her, taking the time to drink in the look of her body beneath his… She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen…

She smiled excitedly up at him in anticipation of what was to come as their lips connected in a passionate kiss. His hands caressed down her sides until they reached the hem of her skirt, pulling it down slowly as he gazed into her eyes, wanting to know if this was really what she wanted to do. Madison smiled warmly up at him. He was being sweet, wanting to be sure of this before continuing. She lifted a hand to his cheek and kissed him lightly before moving her other hand down to his waist where his body suit was bunched up.

Mordin chuckled as she rushed to remove the rest of his body suit. He slid the skirt off her legs and deposited it onto the floor. He must have blanked out at some point, because, before he knew it, his body suit and any other clothing they wore was now on the floor. Mordin leaned back to fully look at the amazing woman under him. Her brown hair was spilled out over the pillow, and her green eyes were sparkling as she looked up into his eyes. He widened his eyes whenever she gave him an inviting wink. She giggled as his eyes narrowed on her and he moved to take down his prey...

He felt her pinned body shiver under him, and it excited him more than he ever thought would be possible. Suppressing a moan, he slid his hands under her back, pressing her body into him and leaning down to kiss her. He felt Madison's hands travel up his back, holding him in place. The boldness of her touch showed him that she wanted more than he was giving her.

He removed his lips from hers and trailed kisses down to her neck where he began to suck and nip lightly at the skin. Madison's fingers pressed into his back, letting him know that she liked what he was doing. As his mouth moved lower and lower, her breath came quicker, her hands coming up to grasp around his head, holding on like her life depended on it.

Madison let him kiss every inch of her body that he could reach. Great gods, there were no words to describe how much he loved this woman! He could feel her fingertip pressing into his scalp, hear her whispering his name, practically begging him for more…and he decided to give it to her…

The hand that had been exploring her body began to drift ever downward, and Madison let out a loud moan and arched her body into him. He smiled and continued to explore her body. But Madison couldn't take anymore of his teasing. She pulled his face up to hers and caught his mouth in a wild, fiery kiss.

The kiss lit a fire within Mordin, settling in his crotch. Unable to hold himself back, he began to enter her slowly, praying to every deity he knew that she wouldn't start fighting him now. If she told him to stop, he felt that he might die…he needed her more than anything, and if she pushed him away now…

Madison's fingernails dug into his back at the slight pain it brought her, but she never told him to pull out. When Mordin's entire length was within her, he waited patiently for her to give him a sign that she was all right and wanted him to continue. When she wrapped her legs around his waist, the true dance had begun…

Sighing, he moved inside her very slowly, testing to see if he was hurting his beloved at all. When she let out a wince, he stopped, fearing the worst. She clutched at his body, showing him her need for more, and he couldn't stop himself from thrusting within her once more, this time gouging a moan out of her lips. Feeling male pride swell within him, he thrusted again, pushing himself as far as he could go, groaning as her walls clenched around him.

Madison's fingernails dug into his shoulder's with each thrust he made. Every move he made sent a feeling through her unlike anything she had ever felt before. She thought that she might literally die there with him inside her. She began rocking her hips in time with his. Her breathing was becoming faster, every now and then interrupted by a moan, with every thrust of his hips.

Mordin gasped as Madison's fingernails continued to scratch against his back, the pain mixed with the pleasure was beginning to overwhelm him. It was one of the most intense feelings he had ever felt, and he never wanted it to stop. He was so in love with this woman and was so star struck of being joined with her like this.

Then he could feel the edge approaching as he continued to thrust in and out of her. As their moans began to become in sync with each other, Mordin opened his eyes to see Madison's eyes shut tightly in pure ecstasy. Her mouth hung open as she moaned, Mordin caught her lips with his as he shifted to add a whole new angle to their lovemaking.

It was his lips on hers and the new way he loving her that sent her tumbling down. Stars exploded, and she gasped in bliss. A man had never made her feel so loved, complete, alive all in one moment. Digging her nails into his back, she felt herself fly across the starry night sky…

As Mordin continued to make love to her, he deepened the kiss more, thrusting his tongue in time with their hips, making Madison moan. Their breathing was now coming in gasps, and the fact that they were locked at the mouth was not helping one bit. He began to thrust harder and faster as he felt the end coming ever closer, the cliff he needed to jump off of to prove his love for Madison was approaching with each thrust and each moan that escaped their mouths.

And then time seemed to stop for the two lovers, each of them losing themselves as they flew up into the heavens. Madison could feel something warm flow into her body just as Mordin felt something leave his body to merge with her own. Almost instantly, time resumed, and they collapsed onto the sheets.

It felt like Mordin's body had become completely paralyzed. The pleasure had been so intense for him that he didn't want to spoil the moment. After a few seconds, he pulled out and shifted so that he was laying down next to her, pulling her close to him as he wrapped the sheets around them. She smiled and turned her head up to look into his eyes. Mordin met her gaze and saw nothing but never dying love and complete adoration in her beautiful neon green eyes. He smiled back and placed a loving kiss upon her lips before they both settled down to have a comfy sleep.

…

It was now morning on the ship.

The stars outside the window drifted lazily along with the ship. He had put his body suit back on and was now fiddling with his lab coat, his hands still shaking from what had happened the night before.

He blinked and glanced at the unmade bed. He saw the blood stain from when he had broken her hymen(Madison had explained to him that it happened all the time with virgins), and he felt his heart sink. He began to wonder if he had actually put her through any pain. She had winced quite a few times during the first three thrusts. And if he did hurt her, how much did he hurt her?

After he had finished dressing, he turned and looked at her, just as she was finishing.

She had her hands behind her back, and she stood in front of the large window, staring out into the stars like they held the answer to every question in the universe. Everything was dark, but she was lit brightly. The light at the end of his tunnel.

He glanced at her neck and saw a couple of easily masked love bites that he had given her. She could easily position her hair to hide them from everyone so that no questions could be asked by anyone on the crew. As Mordin approached her, he decided that he would have to make more.

She turned toward him just as he had wrapped his arms around her waist. He took in a surprised gasp when he saw her eyes become brighter from the light of the system's sun.

When she smiled up at him, he almost forgot how to breathe.

"I love you."

**Fin.**

* * *

_And that's the end of this chapter in Mordin and Madison's life together. I think it's about high time I introduce myself. I'm JunkoTheHatter, in case you didn't take the time see who had written this FanFic._**  
**

_When I first began this story, I thought, _Gee, I should be done with this in about a month. _But I was oh so very wrong. You see I had to deal with so much crap while making this FanFic. Literally, for the past couple of months, this FanFic has been the only highlight of my life. It just so happened to turn out that this particular part of the story was typed up when I was going through a very critical emotional crisis. And I am so sorry if you find this chapter lacking in any way. I was just so upset while writing this and I read it and _I _think it's okay, but I don't know if _you _think it's okay(if that makes sense)._

_I've also decided that I will be making a sequel to this story called _The Scientist_ which should be released here in a few weeks when I get my life all straightened out. The story will take place post-ME2 and it'll lead into the ME3 plot._

_I'm sure that by now you see why I don't put little author's notes after every chapter now. Sorry for my social awkwardness._

_Also, I would like to thank _**poison1234, Gamergirl052, DestinyIntertwined, jozs001, Detective-Mason, and all my anonymous reviewers **_for reviewing my story and enjoying it as well. I worked really hard on it and I'm glad that everyone, so far, appreciates it._

_Remember, be on the lookout for _The Scientist _here in a few weeks._

_Thank you and stay beautiful..._

_JunkoTheHatter_


End file.
